Tag Archives: patience

Fruit of the Spirit: Peace Takes Discipline

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“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace…” — Galatians 5:22-23

When you think about the fruit of the Spirit, what comes to mind?

Sometimes we treat these qualities as if they just happen because we’re connected to God. If we’re walking with Him, we assume peace will naturally settle over us.

Then Jesus says, “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you” (John 14:27). That sounds like a gift. And gifts don’t usually require effort.

So which is it? Is peace a gift, or is it something we have to pursue?

I think the answer is both.

Yes, peace is a gift from Jesus. But throughout Scripture we’re also told to seek peace, pursue peace, let peace rule in our hearts, and be peacemakers. If peace were completely automatic, those commands wouldn’t be necessary.

The Holy Spirit produces peace in us, but we are called to cultivate it.

That’s because peace isn’t passive.

There are countless things competing for your attention every day, fear, bad news, conflict, social media, uncertainty, disappointment, and the desire to control what only God can control. If you don’t intentionally guard your heart and mind, something else will gladly take your peace.

Many of us pray for peace while continuing the very habits that steal it.

We replay conversations in our minds. We scroll until we’re anxious. We focus on everything that’s wrong instead of remembering what God has already done. We try to control outcomes instead of trusting the One who holds them.

Pursuing peace doesn’t always change your circumstances, but it changes how you walk through them.

Peace is practiced one decision at a time.

It looks like choosing prayer over panic. Gratitude over complaining. Trust over control. Forgiveness over bitterness. It looks like closing the news app when you’ve read enough, putting your phone down when your mind needs rest, and fixing your thoughts on what is true instead of everything that could go wrong.

None of those choices earn God’s peace. They simply position our hearts to receive and walk in the peace He has already given us.

You can do all the “right” Christian things—attend church, read your Bible, serve faithfully and still struggle with peace if your heart is clinging to fear or your mind is consumed with distraction.

So here’s the question: What are you trusting for your peace right now?

Because whatever you’re trusting will determine whether your peace rises and falls with your circumstances.

We don’t drift into peace. We drift into distraction. Peace is something we intentionally return to every day.

As we repeatedly return our hearts and minds to Christ, the Holy Spirit continues producing His fruit within us. Peace isn’t passive. It’s practiced. And over time, what begins as discipline becomes a way of life.

Reflection: What has been stealing your peace lately? What is one intentional choice you can make today to return your heart and mind to the peace Christ has already given you?

Prayer: Father God, thank You for the gift of Your peace. Thank You that You did not leave us to navigate this world on our own. Help us to continually return our hearts and minds to You when distractions, fear, and worry pull us away. Teach us to pursue the peace that comes from trusting You, not our circumstances. May Your peace, which surpasses all understanding, guard our hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. Help us practice peace each day until it becomes the posture of our hearts. In Jesus’ name, amen.

November: The Fruit of the Spirit — Who Are You Becoming?

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November is here, and this month we’re going to talk about the Fruit of the Spirit!

When I started planning this series about six months ago, I knew I wanted to do something a little different for November. This is typically the time of year when we focus on gratitude, thankfulness, and giving. And while all those things are important, I wanted us to think about something else, too.

What are we putting out into the world? How are we showing up? And who are we becoming?

Especially with the midterm elections coming up here in America, I think it’s a good time to reflect on how we treat one another, even when we disagree.

I’ve been having a lot of conversations lately about what it really means to follow Jesus. One question that keeps coming up is: Are you trying to be like them, or are you trying to be like Jesus?

Because those are two very different things!

Jesus teaches us to forgive, turn the other cheek, love our enemies, and extend grace. And while that sounds wonderful in theory, putting it into practice can be challenging.

I’m not a particularly petty person, but I’ll admit that always being the bigger person isn’t easy. Sometimes you want to respond with the same energy someone gives you. Sometimes you want to prove your point. And sometimes you know you’re right, but that doesn’t necessarily mean you’re handling the situation correctly.

I’ve had to confront that in my own life recently.

I’ve had conversations where I had to admit that my ego played a role in how I handled a situation. I’ve had to apologize, take responsibility, and recognize that even when someone else contributed to a disagreement, I still had a responsibility for my own behavior.

That has taught me a lot about practicing what I preach.

It’s one thing to say you go to church, read your Bible, pray, and follow Jesus. It’s another thing entirely when someone is yelling at you, pointing fingers, or challenging you, and you have to decide how you’re going to respond.

Are you going to react like everyone else, or are you going to respond in a way that reflects Jesus?

That’s where the Fruit of the Spirit comes in.

Galatians 5:22–23 (NIV) identifies nine characteristics: love, joy, peace, forbearance (patience), kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.

These aren’t simply personality traits that some people naturally have and others don’t. They’re characteristics that the Holy Spirit develops in us as we grow in our relationship with God.

We’re called to cultivate all of them, not just the ones that come naturally.

Some may be easier for us than others. You might be a naturally joyful person but struggle with patience. You might be kind but have difficulty exercising self-control. Or you might be faithful but struggle to respond gently when someone pushes your buttons.

That’s part of growing and maturing spiritually.

Throughout November, we’ll explore what these characteristics actually look like in everyday life. We’ll talk about peace, joy, gentleness, and what it means to have strength under control. We’ll also discuss gratitude as we move through this season of thanksgiving.

But more than anything, I want this series to be practical.

I don’t want us to simply know what the Fruit of the Spirit is. I want us to think about how we demonstrate it in our homes, workplaces, relationships, and communities.

Spiritual growth isn’t just about what we know. It’s about how we live.

So as we begin this month, I want you to consider one question:

If someone looked at the way you treated others this past week, what fruit would they see?

Stay tuned. We’re going to grow together this month!

January 28

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I actually wrote the post March 29 on Jan 28. It was 60 days in the future. I was prophesying over my own life. Putting in the atmosphere to myself and God how I wanted to feel and here we are almost 6 months later and it’s working. There have been hard times in there but I’m handling them better. I’m becoming stronger, more resilient, more open. We are about to get into the summer season and that’s usually where I get off track but I’m still getting things done. I’m having fun, as you are reading this post I’m at the beach but now I can do both. I’m not letting anything distract me and I am seeing the fruit of my labor. Im proud of me and excited to see what the second half of the year brings.

Until next time,

Dominique

Stress and Worry

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Those who are dominated by the sinful nature think about sinful things, but those who are controlled by the Holy Spirit think about things that please the Spirit. So letting your sinful nature control your mind leads to death. But letting the Spirit control your mind leads to life and peace.”
‭‭Romans‬ ‭8‬:‭5‬-‭6‬ ‭NLT‬‬

This verse is about your thought life. What dominates your thoughts , what controls your mind. I also read this verse and thought sinful things Paul most be talking about bad stuff, you know the 10 commandment type stuff. However reading it again I don’t think that’s true. The definition of sin means to miss the mark. That sounds ambiguous but if Jesus is our mark anything we do that takes us away from that target is sin.

I’m talking about the sins of worry and stress. If you are constantly worried and stressed you are not pleasing God. God tells us over and over give our worries to him.

I’ve let my sinful nature take over before. Constantly worried about a project at work. When I do that I take my eyes off God and put them on my problem. It was all I would talk about, think about. I read my Bible but I wasn’t focused. My stomach hurt, I was mean and cranky. I might not have been physically dying but I was spiritually dying. I didn’t have much of a life because I was focused on this one thing.

Once I decided to take my eyes off my problem and back on God I was given some help and found a solution. I let the spirit lead me instead of my stress and I did feel peace but it was roller coaster trying to get there. Choose prayer first.

Make a list of what you’re worried about this week big or small and ask God to help you with these problems. Also talk to a trusted friend or prayer partner. They may be able to help you with your problem. Holding it in, is not helping you.

Until next time,

Dominique

Inspiration

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Hi friends,

Its been awhile. You’ve probably are wondering where I’ve been and what I’ve been doing. I told yall I got a new job back in July. It kind of took over my life. I been working for this promotion for so long when I got it I immediately went into overdrive. It was a busy time.

I got what I prayed for and I put God on the back burner. I had not planned on doing that, it just happened. I still read my bible and I still did my morning devotion but it wasn’t the same. I was more going through the motions.

I stopped going to my caregroup because I was working so late, I stopped getting up to do my devotional and writing in the morning because either I was tired from staying up late from working or staying up late just because I didn’t want to go to bed.

In doing all these things I didn’t feel inspired. I stopped being plugged into the power source. A few minutes reading my bible and writing out my prayers isnt enough to plug into the power source.

What inspires me?

Sermons I hear inspire me, but my church has been doing church online for almost 2 years now and its not the same, not an excuse but its not helping. It’s easier to not be engaged when you are not in person. I also don’t have the same sense of urgency because if I miss it on Sunday I can go back and watch it anytime, or so I would say.
Podcast I listen to inspire me too. However sometimes I just want to be entertained no message necessary.

Why haven’t I been listening to anything inspirational?

I think listening to inspirational stuff reminded me of what I wasn’t doing. As I am writing this I realize that feeling I was feeling wasn’t coming from God. He doesn’t condemn us, he convicts and there is certainly a difference.

As always he is slowly pulling me back in. I have been going to care group again and bible study. I needed it. I also haven’t taken on too much. That has been lingering in the back of mind. I don’t want to be stressed like I was last year around this time. I was starting to feel like I needed to slow down but I didn’t do it and it eventually blew up in my face.

November is National Novel Writing Month and I am going to be working on my book. It’s not a fictional novel but its a book so I am going to try and apply the same principles. At the very least it will give me some accountability.

Writing this book is something that I have been wanting to do for a while. I also know that writing is not always about feeling inspired, its also about consistency. I don’t know where the blog going land as I figure this out. I appreciate you sticking beside me.

Wish me luck,

Dominique

Confession: I don’t know

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This post was originally published on March 14, 2018. As I was looking for something for Throwback Thursday, I saw that this exactly describes how I feel right now. I definitely feel like everything God has had me learn over the past year I am being tested on right now. It feels scary but that is a good thing because if I am being tested, then he thinks I’m ready for the next step.

Not knowing things is not something I’m comfortable with. I like to have a clear plan outlined with action steps. Things don’t always happen that way in a growing season. You only can do some much planting and then you have to sit back and let it grow.

I’m in a growing season right now and growing hurts. The term growing pains is definitely real. It hurts to be stretched more than you thought you could handle. It hurts to let things go that you thought would always be there.

Growing requires more faith than planting. I believe that because you don’t know how the seeds you planted are going to develop. You can’t see on the the outside how the seed is doing or if any growth is happening. You have to trust the process.

I don’t feel like I have been in a real season of growth in my life in a long time. I have had seasons of change but nothing to this extreme. I feel like I’m going through a metamorphosis. I feel like God is working on me about a lot of things. Sometimes I feel like it’s too much. Why do I have to go through all of this?

I feel like everything in my life is in transition and I am questioning a lot of things that I thought I knew for certain. I thought I was on a solid career path but where I see myself headed is different that what I originally envisioned. I am afraid. Am I ready for where God is leading me? I don’t know. I do take comfort in knowing that he won’t leave me on this journey and will give me what I need to be successful.

God is working on me to take me someplace but I don’t know where that is. I have to just walk beside him one step at a time. I am not going to run out in front of him or move to fast. I have done that before and the results were not great. I know I sound sad or down but I’m not. I’m restless. I sense something coming but I don’t know what is. I’m going to continue to keep the junk out so I can hear Gods voice and know it’s him. I’m going to pray and I’m going to wait. I’m going to continue to do meet God half way and I know he will make up the rest. I will have to just continue to be patient and trust the process.

Until next time,

Dominique

Have you noticed?

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If you have been paying attention you would have noticed that I haven’t been doing my post on Fridays in quite a while. I used to feel very guilty about that. I don’t anymore. Times change and that isn’t a realistic goal right now. I still want to make sure I post every month. That’s not something I have accomplished yet in my years of blogging. We are almost half way through the year and I have continued to meet that goal so I feel good about that.

I have been focusing a lot on my mental health over the last year. It has been good. I have made a lot of strides. However as we have often talked about growth is not a straight line and it certainly doesn’t happen on our own time. Over the past few months, I feel like everything I have learned has been put to the test and I can’t say I necessarily passed each test with flying colors.

I will say that I have tried my best. I do recognize that I need to give myself grace. I need to have patience with my own process. Its hard though. My old perfectionist ways just refuse to die!

I Refuse Ayanna Pressley GIF
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I had a lot of mental health stuff I wanted to discuss in April but it didn’t really happen. That’s ok. May is mental health awareness month so I will do it now.

It was hard for me to talk about mental health when I know I was sometimes running to my old coping mechanisms. There is space for that though. April was a good reminder that I am not a constant self improvement project. I don’t have to keep striving to the next thing. I can sit in this space and be satisfied with where I am right now.

I am enough, just because, I don’t have to be producing anything, I can just be.

I just want to remind you that, while you are growing and evolving, take time to celebrate that you aren’t what you used to be. Remember that God put everything inside you of that you need to be the best version of you. You are just peeling back the layers so it can be released. You are just fertilizing the soil so the seed inside of you can blossom.

Until next time,

Dominique

Revising The Golden Rule

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Do to others whatever you would like them to do to you. This is the essence of all that is taught in the law and the prophets.
Matthew 7:12 NLT

I’ve always liked this rule. Its simple and straight to the point. Don’t treat people like garbage if you don’t want to be treated as such. Seems reasonable to me. However, as I have gotten older I realized that this concept is a little black and white. It is a good idea to treat people how you want to be treated however, it doesn’t really take into account how THEY want to be treated.

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For instance, my husband and I share a lot of similar personality traits however his love language is different than mine. I can’t approach him the way I would want to be approached in situations because he doesn’t respond to that.

When I was researching pictures to include in this post, I came across an article that talks about what I was just telling you. The man that wrote it is talking about it from a management angle but I believe that it works in all aspects of life. Do you take account peoples personalities when you have a disagreement with them? It doesn’t even have to be a disagreement, but just how you interact with people on a day to day basis.

I had a disagreement with a coworker…but it was really in my mind. If you asked them, they wouldn’t think we had a disagreement. They said some things to me I really didn’t like and I would never say those things to them. I was pretty upset about but I had to stop and think, what was their intention? Were their intentions good? They were. We don’t think the same and that is ok.

I had a friend that asked me for some constructive feedback and I wasn’t able to fully give it to her. I talked about how I don’t like constructive feedback because I am too hard on myself but that may not be the case for her. We all have blindspots and I could have been more helpful, but I was treating her how I like to be treated. I also didn’t want to hurt her feelings because mine would have been hurt if it was me, but this wasn’t about me.

seth meyers lol GIF by Late Night with Seth Meyers
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Finding the balance in how to treat people in a way that works for you and works for them is tricky but doable. Sometimes we get in caught up in our thought process and that is ok as long as your recognize it.

I believe the biggest thing to consider when trying to treat people how you want to be treated is remember compassion, empathy, respect and patience. Those things are universal.

The Golden Rule is a good place to start but its the baseline. If you start with this you will end up in a good space but if you take it a step further, you can probably have a solution that works for everybody.

60 days is plenty of time

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I stole this from my friend, who stole it from Instagram.

My friend dropped this in the group chat the other day and it was great reminder. Even though we are at the end of the year doesn’t mean God can’t show out. Its funny in our human mind it feels like there isn’t enough time left to start something new or break a bad habit or let something go. Not true.

New living translation.

With that in mind, I decided to pull out the vision board I made at the beginning of the year.

my vision board.

Did you make a vision board this year? Do you still look it at? If not pull it out. Now is a good time to evaluate and see the progress you are making on your vision. I completely understand that this year probably looks nothing like you had originally planned it to be. That’s ok. This is a great time to make adjustments if you need to.

One thing I plan on doing with my vision board before the year is over, is finding scriptures to match the pictures and phrases I cut out. I believe it helps to have a biblical backing that way you know what you want is confirmed in the word.

I also need to tweak some things I put on there. I was in a different headspace back in January/February then now. This is ok. We are not people who are meant to be static, change is fluid. We aren’t locked in to anything.

I have something easier for you if you don’t feel like making a vision board. I wrote out a prayer and then I found a scripture to match my prayer. Having that scripture to go along with my prayer helps me when I feel like what I am praying for isn’t happening or its moving slow. Having the scripture as the foundation lets me know that what I am asking for is in God’s will because it is in his word. For the word of God will not fail. Luke 1:37

Prayer

We ask God to give you complete knowledge of his will and to give you spiritual wisdom and understanding. Then the way you live will always honor and please the Lord, and your lives will produce every kind of good fruit. All the while, you will grow as you learn to know God better and better. We also pray that you will be strengthened with all his glorious power so you will have all the endurance and patience you need. May you be filled with joy, always thanking the Father. He has enabled you to share in the inheritance that belongs to his people, who live in the light. Colossians 1:9-12 NLT https://bible.com/bible/116/col.1.12.NLT

God please give me wisdom to be a good wife, mom and leader. Help me instead of taking on my friends problems pray for them more. Help me count my blessings and be thankful for everything I have. Help me not compare my life to anyone else’s. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.

Unlearning

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One thing I’ve picked up during this odd year of 2020 is unlearning.

What have you had to unlearn? For me it’s been a lot. I used some of these thought processes for protection to make sure I wouldn’t get hurt. Im learning to be more vulnerable, to trust more, and I realize I don’t need to think this way anymore.

1. Everything is not what it seems. Sometimes our perceptions are wrong. We are making decisions based on limited knowledge, our bias, our feelings. All those things could potentially not be right. Keeping this in the back of my mind has helped me look at things from all angles before making a decision.

2. Everything is not black or white or even gray. I was very much a person who thought things were one way or not. No shade but, it is what it is. In the this world of COVID-19 I’ve learned things are not always one way or another. There could be a third option that I never even considered.

Voting Michelle Obama GIF by Joe Biden
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3. Everyone doesn’t have to move at the same pace. I used to think I was behind everybody in spiritual knowledge, in having kids, fancy careers. However I have to remind myself that I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be. God put me in this place. It’s not a race. I’m not competing with anyone, not even myself. There are no timelines or schedules because God’s timing is always perfect.

4. What works for you, may not work for me. This is another small thing but changing my thinking has been huge. The first thing that made me think of this is the natural hair movement. You can watch tons of tutorials and it still not turn out right. Follow someone’s regimen to the letter and still not get the changes you were expecting. What worked for them may not work for me. That can be applied to just about anything in life.

5. People aren’t judging me. People aren’t looking at me. Or even thinking about me. Folks are more concerned about themselves than they are with what I’m doing, wearing etc. Letting this go allows me to live more free.

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6. Its never too late. For anything. Ever. The older you get the more people start to tell you your too old for this or that. Not true. It’s never too late. If your good, it’s going to come through in what you do. You want to make a career switch? Do it! You want to move out of state? Do it! Nothing is holding you back but you.

These lessons have been huge. They may seem like simple changes but they represent gigantic changes in mindset. As we get to the last quarter of the year think about how you might need to change your mindset. Its never too late.