I have been working in the same job for the last 4 years. I am a college counselor. I love my job and am I good at it. I recently made a move to a new school this year and it completely shook my confidence.
I have only been there a month but I have learned a lot of lessons in the last 30 days.
1. I don’t have anything to prove. I am good at my job and I don’t have to do it the same way the previous person did.
2. I can not be everything for everybody. I was literally running myself ragged trying to make every meeting, do every presentation, sometimes trying to be two places at once. It was unnecessary. I wasn’t giving anything 100% because I was trying to do too much.
3. I can make mistakes. I am not perfect and that is ok. Nobody is putting any pressure on me but me. I just need to relax and do what I’m good at.
4. Trust is a very interesting thing. I’m going to talk more about this in a later post. I don’t really know the team I am working with that well yet. I am used to being excluded from things and being left off emails so I have been just showing up places. I don’t need to, my counterpart hasn’t left me off anything. He hasn’t done anything for me not to trust him.
Being a new person is not easy for me, nor is change. When I first started it was hard. I was lonely and nervous and unsure of myself. 30 days later I feel more relaxed. I have made some friends and I am learning the lay of the land. This change is exactly what I didn’t know I needed. I am so glad that I didn’t block my blessing by being afraid.
When I was looking for writing prompts for my 31 posts in 31 days (1) one of the prompts was, is your astrological sign accurate, why or why not? I was instantly intrigued because astrology is not something that Christians typically talk about.
Do you believe or practice astrology? Do you read your horoscope in the paper or online? I have never been one to really get into astrology but I do look at my birth sign and try to see if the traits attributed to me are accurate or not. I hate to admit they are pretty accurate. I am a Virgo. My birthday is September 13. When I look up characteristics of my sign, I am not surprised by what I find.
Virgo Strength Keywords:
Virgo Weakness Keywords:
I am definitely 90% of these things.
These traits go well together and fairly accurate in their position. The bible is not a big fan of astrologers however. God is not into it at all. There are several verses that speak openly about astrologers, diviners, etc.
” data-hasqtip=”4″ aria-describedby=”qtip-4″>Leviticus 19:26
‘You shall not eat anything with the blood, nor practice divination or soothsaying.
” data-hasqtip=”6″ aria-describedby=”qtip-6″>Daniel 1:20
As for every matter of wisdom and understanding about which the king consulted them, he found them ten times better than all the magicians and conjurers who were in all his realm
” data-hasqtip=”11″ aria-describedby=”qtip-11″>Deuteronomy 18:9-12
“When you enter the land which the LORD your God gives you, you shall not learn to imitate the detestable things of those nations. “There shall not be found among you anyone who makes his son or his daughter pass through the fire, one who uses divination, one who practices witchcraft, or one who interprets omens, or a sorcerer, or one who casts a spell, or a medium, or a spiritist, or one who calls up the dead. read more.
“For whoever does these things is detestable to the LORD; and because of these detestable things the LORD your God will drive them out before you.
I personally don’t think it is that bad to know about your personality, and why you do certain things. I don’t personally believe it is a gateway to other dark spirits or things like that. I take it for what is and leave it at that. I have never believed in my horoscope because they are just to general to be true. As I have been digging deeper to figure out why I act the way I do, I have realized that a lot of things are based on nurture or how I was raised. I don’t want pass down any negative behavior down to my children and I will not be using when they are born to determine their personality. When I need answers to things I turn to God not to the stars.
Offer sacrifices in the right spirit, and trust the Lord .
Psalms 4:5 NLT
What are you trusting God for? Are you making any sacrifices? You all know that I have been trying to get pregnant for a while. I have definitely sacrificed a lot of things, time, money, vacations, jobs, my skin. I know all of us have made sacrifices as we attempt to accomplish our dreams.
As you are trusting God and making sacrifices are you doing it in the right spirit? I came across this scripture last night and it was a great reminder. God doesn’t just want our sacrifice, he wants the right attitude as well. Your sacrifice doesn’t mean much if your attitude is not right. Sacrifices suck while you are in the midst but you know everything is for your good. I say that a lot but it’s a good thing to remember while you are working toward a goal. When you get what you have been working toward it will feel much better if you had a good attitude along the way.
How do you know if your spirit is right? Are you complaining about every missed opportunity? Are you jealous of other people who didn’t have to sacrifice as much as you have to get to their goal? Do you only do a half job at one you are trying to do because you are tired of working towards a goal and seeing no results? I have some point have definitely done all of these things. Here is a prayer to help with that.
You can just pray that line and let God change your attitude. He wants to help us and he would rather we admit we need the help to change then grumble our way to accomplishing our hearts desires.
Such a cliche right? I know but cliches are well known for a reason. It definitely fits my situation.
I have been pretty M.I.A most of the winter and spring. I usually hideout during the winter just because it’s cold and get over that post holiday hump but this year was different.
So many people had awesome things going on around me, new babies, new jobs, new houses and we didn’t have anything new happening. Which isn’t necessarily a bad thing or surprising. We have been cruising in a good space for a while, we have found a good rhythm. Its hard to admit you are jealous or envious of your friends or family or coworkers. I don’t want to use the word envious or jealous because those are usually described as negative emotions. It’s more I’m happy for you and sad for me. Nobody wants that kind of energy at their birthday party, housewarming, BBQ, etc. I never want to be a Debbie Downee when I go somewhere so I just decided to stay away. That probably wasnt the best way to do it but hey we do what we know.
I know somebody who has had to watch other people around her have kids for years and she has been nothing but supportive. She is older than me so maybe it takes years to grow to that level of maturity. I admire that because I definitely couldn’t do it. I am not there yet but I’m working on it. God is making it more and more uncomfortable to be in this box. I haven’t been to a baby shower in years but now the people having babies are getting closer and closer to me. No choice but to go. I’m also trying to grow. I know I should be doing better, it is just hard.
The next time you haven’t heard from someone you care about in a while, reach out. I appreciate all the invites I got even though I wasn’t going.
The biggest reason now that’s holding me back from jumping back into the fray of where I used to hang out is because I don’t want to explain what I have been doing or why I wasn’t around.
That’s probably selfish of me. Would you feel like you wanted an explanation? Would you accept its not you, it’s me?
Do you do the right thing just because its the right thing? Is that a bad thing?
I have always tried to do the right thing because it was right even when I didn’t want to do it, sometimes to my own detriment. Interestingly enough I never want somebody to do something for me if they don’t want to do it. I feel intentions matter and if you’re heart isn’t in, don’t do it for me.
In Sunday school we talked about doing the right thing because it’s right and my friend said its like by building muscle memory. The more you do it the better you grow and develop that muscle. I hadn’t thought about it that way before. The more you do something the more you want to do it. Which makes good sense. Joyce Meyer says the mark of spiritual growth is sometimes doing things you don’t want to do. I appreciate that and I am working on it.
I remember when I first started going to Sunday school I didn’t want to go. I only went because the teacher asked me like three times to go. I went and I did enjoy it and I have been going since he invited me, almost 2 months ago.
That’s the thing with doing what’s right even when you don’t want to, God will change your desires to match his desires. If you are continuously doing something and you still don’t like it and it has been a few months, pray about it. Even though God is more concerned with our character than comfort, he doesn’t want us to be miserable. If you are not growing in a situation then it may be time to reevaluate.
I talked about doing the right thing even when you don’t want in my post WWJD. In that post it was more about doing the right thing when somebody is being reckless and you decide to be the bigger person. In the situation I’m referencing now, I am thinking more about going to church when you don’t feel like it, volunteering, going to baby shower/retirement party/social activity when you don’t want to, visiting your grandma, things like that. Sometimes it is good to push outside your comfort zone because things are usually worse in our heads than in real life. You may even get there, enjoy yourself and want to do it more often.
I was at leadership meeting at church and the guy leading the class asked us what God is working on in us. One person said self forgiveness. He said he felt like he was putting expectations on himself that God had not put on him. I have been thinking about that statement all week.
This week was rough. I just have a lot of things going on right now and I felt like I was doing a disservice to God but I couldn’t put my finger on why. It lead me to do a lot of research on condemnation vs conviction, which I will post about next week. I still didn’t feel like I had the answer though. I have been pretty diligent. Usually when I feel this way, I fall into a Netflix of Hulu binge but this time I didn’t. I’m still reading everyday, through the bible in a year plan on YouVerse bible app and having my quiet time. So I asked God, what do you want me to do? What do you expect of me? Just a few days ago.
He gave me the answer today. In Deuteronomy, God says all he wants you do is fear him and do what pleases him. That’s it. Sounds pretty simple. In a way yes, but in a way no. I have been doing a lot of research on what pleases God for quite sometime. There are a lot of things in the bible about what doesn’t please God but I feel like there is less emphasis on what does please him.
I think that is because God doesn’t want us to work ourselves to death in trying to please him. Loving him with all your heart, soul and strength is not an easy task. This is why he gives us grace. Grace to mess up, grace to mistakes. He sees our hearts and our intentions.
He just wants us to do the best we can. I lose sight of this because I have placed expectations on myself that God never did. I never noticed I did that before. I have been trying to grow so fast. I want to be as close to perfect as possible, which really isn’t humble. I want God to know I’m paying attention, that I’m not just being a reader of the word but a doer of the word. James 1:22-24.
Are you being too hard on yourself? Try not to be. Don’t run from God when you feel this way, run towards him. He will always give you answers and typically sooner than you think.
Patience-the capacity to accept or tolerate delay, trouble, or suffering without getting angry or upset.
I haven’t really been writing this week because it’s been a pretty crappy week to say the least. It sucks but it happens. I spent time with my girls this weekend in a quick getaway which lifted my spirits a bit.
I saw the prompt of the day was Patience. Sheesh! I immediately felt that in my spirit and then the verse of the day from the Youverse bible is about patience.
I’m like ok God I get it. I’m working on it. I just feel like I’m always having to be patient. I’m listening to my girl Joyce (Meyer) and she said something that really struck me. Don’t try harder, get closer to God.
In bible study this week, Beth Moore talked about different types of patience.Patience with situations and patience with people. I find I moreso need patience with circumstances than people but Beth brought up a good point. God is testing your patience with people because he wants to bring something out of you that is holding you back from greatness.
God gives us patience in circumstances to see if we are going to act differently in the same situation. This really got me thinking. I don’t always act differently in the same situations. I am making more of an effort to do so after hearing this lesson.
I don’t want to keep going around the same mountain over and over. I want patience to do a good work in me until it is complete. Philippians 1:6.
Patience is definitely a challenge but there is good reason to wait well. I’m going to stop trying so hard to be patient and seek God more. That way, I am so focused on him that patience is my natural response things.
Not knowing things is not something I’m comfortable with. I like to have a clear plan outlined with action steps. Things don’t always happen that way in a growing season. You only can do some much planting and then you have to sit back and let it grow.
I’m in a growing season right now and growing hurts. The term growing pains is definitely real. It hurts to be stretched more than you thought you could handle. It hurts to let things go that you thought would always be there.
Growing requires more faith than planting. I believe that because you don’t know how the seeds you planted are going to develop. You can’t see on the the outside how the seed is doing or if any growth is happening. You have to trust the process.
I don’t feel like I have been in a real season of growth in my life in a long time. I have had seasons of change but nothing to this extreme. I feel like I’m going through a metamorphosis. I feel like God is working on me about a lot of things. Sometimes I feel like it’s too much. Why do I have to go through all of is?
I feel like everything in my life is in transition and I am questioning a lot of things that I thought I knew for certain. I thought I was on a solid career path but where I see myself headed is different that what I originally envisioned. I am afraid. Am I ready for where God is leading me? I don’t know. I do take comfort in knowing that he won’t leave me on this journey and will give me what I need to be successful.
God is working on me to take me someplace but I don’t know where that is. I have to just walk beside him one step at a time. I am not going to run out in front of him or move to fast. I have done that before and the results were not great. I know I sound sad or down but I’m not. I’m restless. I sense something coming but I don’t know what is. I’m going to continue to keep the junk out so I can hear Gods voice and know it’s him. I’m going to pray and I’m going to wait. I’m going to continue to do meet God half way and I know he will make up the rest. I will have to just continue to be patient and trust the process.
God does not like the proud. AT. ALL.
I never thought I was a person that had a problem with humility. I am not a bragger, I don’t take credit for others people work, I am not obnoxious. These are the things I think about when I think of person with a humility problem. As God has been working on me, I discovered that humility is a multilayered concept and once I start peeling back the onion that I wasn’t as humble as I thought I was. I was listening to Joyce Meyer the other day and she had this list of characters traits of people who are humble. Once I heard this list I knew I had some work to do.
- Ask for help, don’t insist that things go there on way-I don’t ask for help because I don’t typically do things I don’t know how to do already.
- Quick to forgive, slow to offend glad to wait on God for vindication
- Patient and long suffering with weakness of other people- I work in a high school. I am not always patient with people weaknesses because I hate to see wasted potential. I have students who are in the top 10% of the class not doing anything and it makes me so mad, and then I lose my patience with them. I have to remind myself they are just children.
- Peace maker and peace lover
- Romans 12 never overestimate yourself, adapt yourself to other people
- Knows when to be quiet- I do not know when to be quiet. I talk entirely too much which is not always a bad thing. I am the person that used to always speak first in group settings, but now I try 3 before me. I also try to make sure that anything I have to add is necessary and beneficial to the conversation.
- First to apologize-I am certainly not first to apologize because I don’t always feel that I am wrong. My husband is always first to apologize even when it isn’t his fault, which makes me really upset. He is one the most humble people I know though.
- See and admit own weakness-I see them, but its much harder for me to admit them. I am working on it though. I talk about that some in this post. Is fear of failure selfish?
- Gives credit where it’s due
- Happily servers other people
- Very thankful
- Quick to repent- I am now. I think my problem before is that I didn’t realize I was doing things that didn’t please God. I am thankful for conviction.
- Treats everyone with respect
I stumbled across this post at the Godly Chic Diaries about humility and it made a lot of sense. She brings up another layer of this humility onion. I will be talking more about as I work through these different layers.
How humble are you? After looking at this list do you see some things you need to work on?
I told my friend I was trying not to pray for myself and she looked at me like I was crazy. I am definitely trying to do that though. I have my quiet time in the morning before I go to work. I read the bible for about 10-15 and then I journal before I get in the shower. Recently in that quiet time I have been trying to limit how much I pray for myself and focus more on praying for others. Some days the prayers are focused like I may pray for my husband all day or one of my friends or my mom or little brother and nephew. I say the same short prayer for myself every morning before I get in the shower. Lord help me have less of me and more of you. John 3:30
That’s it. God already knows what I need and what I desire. If I receive less of me and more of him, then I can handle any situation that comes at me. It will help me keep my flesh at bay and respond to things in a way that He would think is appropriate.
This article on Crosswalk speaks to exactly how I am feeling.