Impostor syndrome

 Imposter syndrome can be defined as a collection of feelings of inadequacy that persist despite evident success. ‘Imposters’ suffer from chronic self-doubt and a sense of intellectual fraudulence that override any feelings of success or external proof of their competence. They seem unable to internalize their accomplishments, however successful they are in their field. High achieving, highly successful people often suffer, so imposter syndrome doesn’t equate with low self-esteem or a lack of self-confidence. In fact, some researchers have linked it with perfectionism, especially in women and among academics. (Hbr.org)

imposter syndrome

My impostor type is the perfectionist. I have talked before about trying to work on my perfectionism. I didn’t realize that this was a part of impostor syndrome. Honestly, I see myself in quite a few of these examples. 

I came across this verse while I have been studying my identity in Christ. I have been learning who God says I am to combat a lot of things that I have been dealing with in my life. More on that in later posts, but my research and studying has been super helpful.

When I saw this verse, I read it in a few different translations, the best version being in The Message version. Check it out.

We are confident of all this because of our great trust in God through Christ. It is not that we think we are qualified to do anything on our own. Our qualification comes from God. 

2 Corinthians 3:4‭-5 NLT 

We couldn’t be more sure of ourselves in this—that you, written by Christ himself for God, are our letter of recommendation. We wouldn’t think of writing this kind of letter about ourselves. Only God can write such a letter. His letter authorizes us to help carry out this new plan of action. The plan wasn’t written out with ink on paper, with pages and pages of legal footnotes, killing your spirit. It’s written with Spirit on spirit, his life on our lives!

2 Corinthians 3:4-6 MSG

 The Lord wrote my letter of recommendation.

Who can best that? Who better knows your skills, abilities, strengths than God? Often times people get positions because of who they know. I have hired people just on the strength of the recommender. How much better is it when God is our recommender? I know it can be scary and we might not feel like we are ready but you are. The Holy Spirit takes us beyond our natural ability. Remember your natural ability is already the bomb. That’s how you got into the room. God is just going to take you to the next level. God feels in the gaps for you. What you don’t have He will supply. You just have to take the first step.

You don’t have to bend over backwards to prove yourself if God is your recommender. Your work speaks for it self. You aren’t an impostor. You earned this!

 Don’t let anyone, not even yourself, talk you out of what God said you could already do. 


Resources

https://www.themuse.com/advice/5-different-types-of-imposter-syndrome-and-5-ways-to-battle-each-one

https://hbr.org/2008/05/overcoming-imposter-syndrome

Watch this video about impostor syndrome. Its only 4 minutes long. 

Progress over perfection

Is fear of failure selfish?

 

Making bible study interesting

When you hear bible study what do you think? Boring, hard, work, school, too difficult. Too much. Where do I start?

too much headache GIF

giphy.com

I used to feel that way about bible study. Some times I still do.

If you have been reading this blog for any period of time you would say, but Dominique you like to read. True. I do. So that helps. I bet you would like to read if it was interesting and didn’t take a long time. Bible study doesn’t have to be like being back in school. It can be as simple as you want it to be. The internet has made it a lot easier to find a method that works for you.

This is what I do. 

Pray. I don’t mean in any overly spiritual sense. Just ask God to show what he wants you to see.

Think. Think about the things you ask God when you pray. Do you ask God to bless you at work? Do you ask God to help you raise your kids? Do you ask God to help you be a better wife, partner, etc? Do you want to know God’s character or promises? You can start there.

Find. You can do this a few different ways. You can look in the bible app and they have a search option where you can type a key word and it will give you all the scriptures in the bible that relate to that word. So when I wanted to know who God is, I type it in the search box.

Tons of scripture popped up. If you’re old schooling it and reading a physical bible, it hopefully has a topic search in the back where you can look up things by subject. If you don’t have a study bible you should get one. Super helpful. They typically have reading plans to help you get started, so you aren’t just opening your bible and trying to land on something that speaks to you. I definitely used to do that. You could also go to Pintrest or Google and somebody has already did the finding for you, you just have to get your verse for the day.

wp-15979329056089130846744176274748.jpg

Pintrest.com livingfreeindeed.com

Write. Once you find a verse or passage that speaks to what you’re looking for, write it down. It can be in the notes app on your phone, but you want to write down what comes to your head or questions you may have so you can refer back to it later. 

Remember this:

The good thing about studying the bible is that it doesn’t have to be done in any specific way. There are tons of methods out there. 

15 minutes is a great place to start. God just wants your time and attention. Reading the bible is good but it just skims the surface. Devotionals are a great place to start if you don’t have a lot of time.

Pray and write, that’s all you have to do, everything else will fall into place.

The more you study the word of God, unlike Algebra, or OChem, the more you will want to study it and learn more. 

Don’t worry I am here to help. I am going to include  in future posts some more bible study methods and tips that will help.


Resources

Good study bibles-Quest, LifeHack, Life Application  

SOAP bible study method

11 Ways to Study the Bible: Methods, Techniques & Tips

 

 

Who is helping you grow? (27)

The godly people in the land are my true heroes! I take pleasure in them!

Psalms 16:3 NLT

https://bible.com/bible/116/psa.16.3.NLT

I came across this the other day and it was a great reminder. Who are the godly people you look up to? I’m not talking about just surrounding yourself with godly friends but actually having people around that help you grow. Do you have a Christian mentor? Do you go to Sunday school or attend a bible study? Who is helping you in your spiritual growth? Do you read books or listen to podcasts that help in your growth?

No person is an island and we all need help. The small group I am in, has changed my life for the better. These women have challenged me, inspired, informed me. They have made me a strong prayer warrior and Christian women. They have encouraged me when I didn’t think I could go forward.

If you are the smartest person you know, then you need a new circle. If you are the only person praying over your life, then you may want to get some new friends.

Who is your enemy? (26)

I know that you are pleased with me, for my enemy does not triumph over me.

Psalm 41:11 NIV

Who is my enemy? I used to read this literally, that this was talking about a actual enemy doesn’t triumph over me. For a long time I didn’t think it applied to me. I was well liked, it sounds nice but I don’t need this actual piece.

When you start asking questions like who is my enemy then you notice it is saying something deeper. If the world is my enemy then I have some work to do.

How can the world triumph over me? By making me think things of this world are acceptable to God. TV, social media, movies, magazines, etc.

People get mad because the bible doesn’t explicitly say you can’t do certain things. Children need you tell them exactly what they want you to do.God is your parent he wants you to start figuring things out for yourself. He kind of was of literal if you think about it. He said don’t be transformed by the things of this world. Be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Romans 12:2

James 4:4

You adulterous people! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God.

I deal with this on a daily basis. Trying to not to conform. I don’t always do so well. I don’t want to be a nun. What is the balance? Have you found it? I think the older I get the easier it is, but it is still difficult. The method is easy, closer you are to God easier it is to be like him. The action is what is harder.

Saints walked with Jesus. You can’t cut up when you standing right next to the person who knows your intention. You can’t run or hid from. God he is compassionate. We don’t have to be saints,  he will be with you any situation if you invite him in.

 

 

The best part of waking up (5)

When you wake up in the morning what’s the first thing that comes to mind? I used to think about about my to do lists, what I needed to get done at work or at home. I read a devotional that said the first thing you should be thinking about is thanking God. Not thinking about how the day is going to go or what you have to do but just thanking God for waking you up today.

Image result for first thing in the morning thank God

I am not talking about doing a devotional this is even before you get out of bed. I thought I was doing ok because I got up everything morning and did my devotional but sometimes it would take my brain time to slow down from whatever I was laying in the bed plotting about before I started doing my devotional. This way I am in position to receive the word from God. I am not rushing through my devotional as much and it helps me connect more to the material. This literally takes no time but it changes the entire perspective of my day.

Next time you get out of bed, just thank the Lord for waking you up and for new mercies,then go do your devotional or carry on with your morning routine. See if that makes any differences for you. Let me know how it goes.

Dominique

Job 13:15

Though he slay me, yet will I hope in him; I will surely defend my ways to his face.
Job 13:15 NIV
https://bible.com/bible/111/job.13.15.NIV

This is one of my favorite verses. Many times in my life I thought God was slaying. I didn’t understand what he was doing or why. Sometimes the what would come together but the why would remain elusive. The why doesn’t really matter though. I know I am not going through half the things Job went through and God proved himself faithful then.

I like that I will surely defend my ways to his face. God isn’t afraid of confrontation or our feelings. I like that. It shows that he really wants to be our friend and not just our father. He knows what I am thinking anyway so I might as well get it out.

Things tend to always find a way to come together, better than I thought or could have imagined. God is good All the time.Even when we don’t understand, even when don’t like it, he is good. I’m so glad I have this verse as a reminder. It’s never as bad as I think it is. God won’t play me and he won’t play you either.

Tempted by the devil

Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour. Stand firm against him, and be strong in your faith. Remember that your family of believers all over the world is going through the same kind of suffering you are.

1 Peter 5:8‭-‬9 NLT
https://bible.com/bible/116/1pe.5.8-9.NLT

The devil never tempts us with things we don’t like. I have been dreaming about things I used to do, activities I have given up. I haven’t thought about them in months and then I have like 3 dreams back to back about it. Definitely kind of crazy. This verse of the day really made me think like this must be a warning from God.I am supposed to be reading Job this week but I really don’t want to. That whole story started because the devil wanted to mess with him, prove a point to God. Now I know God allowed it but he still was testing him, threw his name out there to see what would happen. I hope God isn’t testing me. I am no Job or Jesus. He was tested too. I may fall back into temptation. Maybe, maybe not. I certainly hope not. It is easy for me to rationalize when I want to do something. I have some free time coming up and idle hands are the devils playground. I am definitely going to stay aware and prayed up.

Idol making

The bible describes idolatry as the worship of an image or a created object.

Hair became my idol because I skipped my devotional to do it. Didn’t iron, almost was late to work. All to make sure my hair looked good. It was bigger than hair though. I was listening to Joyce Meyer the other day and she asked, Do you care more about your earthly clothes or your spiritual clothes? Does it take you longer to put on your earthly clothes then your spiritual clothes? I really had stop and think about that. My hair isn’t my idol anymore. We have come to an agreement. I still sometimes take too much time on my appearance and overall look before I walk out the door, rushing to make sure I’m not going to be late. I am getting better but some days it is still a struggle. I never am rushing out the door because my quiet time went too long. Even when my quiet time goes too long, somehow, I am never late for work. Thanks God!

What is your idol? What are you putting in front of your relationship with God? Is it sleep? Is it tv? Is it work? A relationship? Anything you put in front of God is an idol. I never really thought about that before. It’s startling when you get this conviction at first. I know I was shocked but when you start paying attention, it makes a lot of sense.

Don’t let anything become an idol. In the end nothing is as important as your relationship with God. He just wants to spend time with us. I talked about that in this post, Is God your friend? Anything can become an idol, especially when you aren’t paying attention. Stay diligent, the devil always wants you to get your eyes off God and on to yourself. Spending time with God is something you are going to have to be intentional about, just like spending time with your friends or your spouse.

A routine isn’t necessary, he just wants a some of your time. Take some time this week and pray to God to remove anything that is getting in the way of spending time with him.

For more information:

http://www.patheos.com/blogs/christiancrier/2015/08/17/what-does-idolatry-mean-a-biblical-definition-of-idolatry/

https://www.biblestudytools.com/dictionary/idolatry/

Inefficient

Inefficient-not achieving maximum productivity; wasting or failing to make the best use of time or resources.

Often times I think about the dreams and goals that I have and want to accomplish and I feel  inefficient. I certainly don’t feel like I am making the best use of my time or resources. I have two degrees that I do not really use and I’m starting to to get the itch that I want to do something else. Am I qualified?  Sometimes I think so, but other days not so much. I am debating on if I want to get an Ed.d, which is a doctorate in education because that is what I have been doing for the last 10+ years but I don’t know. I know to make any real money or move up, a terminal degree would be nice but I want a job that is bigger than money. Do I want to do something totally different? I didn’t get into my field to make a lot of money but I want to be comfortable. I don’t want to put all the financial heavy lifting to my husband. I have two degrees, I want to pull my own weight.

When I got my master’s there wasn’t a lot of asking God or contemplating. I did a little research, asked the higher ups around me and did it. I want to put a little more thought and time into my choice this time around. I don’t think having more formal education is what makes feel inefficient. I have to remind myself that his grace is sufficient. He is strong when I am weak.

his-grace-is-sufficient-erica-hanel

I probably feel this way because what I really want to do I have no formal training at all. I want to be a writer. I want to write books that will be read all over the world and be referenced for years to come. I can’t really imagine that happening in my wildest dreams. Why not? I haven’t even tried yet and I am already talking myself out of it. Nobody can make me feel inefficient but me. I know it won’t be easy but if I take one step, God will take two. I was not made to be inefficient or mediocre. I was created for his purpose. There is something inside of me that is waiting to be revealed and the only person that can stop me from reaching my full potential is me.

 

 

Imagination

No eye has seen, no ear has heard and no mind has imagined what God has prepared for those who love him. 1 Corinthians 2:9

Do you ever let your Imagination run wild? Do you meditate on the awesome things God can do you in your life? Do you stop yourself because the goal is to big, to lofty, it makes no sense right now? God doesn’t think that way. He just wants us to ask him. We have not because we ask not. (James 4:2-3) He knows what you want already, before we put it out there. When we are children we are encouraged to use our imagination, however as we become adults we are told to be realistic. The great thing about God is that he doesn’t want us to be realistic. He wants us to dream big! (Matthew 7:7-12)

Don’t let life weight you down. Give your dreams to God. He wants to bless you. (2 Corinthians 9:8) He wants to see you win, you just have to be willing to be obedient and to trust him.

Check out this sermon from Rick Warren. He knows about using your imagination and dreaming big.