100th post (20)

Capture100

I can’t believe I’m here. I thought it would take me longer but 31 posts in 31 days (1) helped get that done. I never thought I would get a 100 strangers to read my story or anything that I write down. I have big writing goals. I have been listening to books on how people write and when they got started. I don’t feel so behind. I have so many ideas, I just need to pick one and start writing. I’m all over the place, fiction, non-fiction. I haven’t found an idea I really wanted to start.

I wrote 87 of my posts in 2018, which is crazy to me because I published my first post in October. I count that as my true anniversary not June when I purchased the domain.

I asked about classes or training and I got some good info that I will be checking out. I’m excited to take the next step. It’s comforting to hear writers you really respect say, “I threw away 4 books before I had one good enough to publish”. – Janet Evanovich

I know that I’m on the right track. I just need to do it. Failing is so hard and not something I do often. I don’t fail often because I don’t like to do things I where I am not great. I hate to be one of those people that talk about writing a book but never do it. I don’t want fear to hold me back. What’s the worst that could happen? If nobody wants to read it, at least I finished it. That is a big deal. It doesn’t have to be perfect and I am ok with that.

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Confession: I don’t know

Not knowing things is not something I’m comfortable with. I like to have a clear plan outlined with action steps. Things don’t always happen that way in a growing season. You only can do some much planting and then you have to sit back and let it grow.

I’m in a growing season right now and growing hurts. The term growing pains is definitely real. It hurts to be stretched more than you thought you could handle. It hurts to let things go that you thought would always be there.

Growing requires more faith than planting. I believe that because you don’t know how the seeds you planted are going to develop. You can’t see on the the outside how the seed is doing or if any growth is happening. You have to trust the process.

I don’t feel like I have been in a real season of growth in my life in a long time. I have had seasons of change but nothing to this extreme. I feel like I’m going through a metamorphosis. I feel like God is working on me about a lot of things. Sometimes I feel like it’s too much. Why do I have to go through all of is?

I feel like everything in my life is in transition and I am questioning a lot of things that I thought I knew for certain. I thought I was on a solid career path but where I see myself headed is different that what I originally envisioned. I am afraid. Am I ready for where God is leading me? I don’t know. I do take comfort in knowing that he won’t leave me on this journey and will give me what I need to be successful.

God is working on me to take me someplace but I don’t know where that is. I have to just walk beside him one step at a time. I am not going to run out in front of him or move to fast. I have done that before and the results were not great. I know I sound sad or down but I’m not. I’m restless. I sense something coming but I don’t know what is. I’m going to continue to keep the junk out so I can hear Gods voice and know it’s him. I’m going to pray and I’m going to wait. I’m going to continue to do meet God half way and I know he will make up the rest. I will have to just continue to be patient and trust the process.

Spiritual check

We are almost 40 days into 2018. I know you are putting together goals and vision boards and speaking affirmations over your life. This is all great stuff. One thing though, have you thought about your spiritual goals at all? As we get settled into the new year you should ask yourself some questions. Are you any closer to God than you were last year? Are you consistently having a quiet time? Have you memorized any bible verses? Writing goals down is great idea but you won’t be able to accomplish these goals nearly as well if you aren’t putting God first in everything you do.

I had a list of things I wanted to accomplish and do in summer of 2017. I literally made out a list the weekend before memorial day and prayed to God to help me accomplish every goal that I had set. It happened. I was surprised! It wasn’t difficult at all either. I wasn’t really solely on my own skills or abilities. As we walk into this new year, take stock of where your relationship with God. Try to make that a priority in 2018 as well, just as much as you want to go further in your career, exercise, and visit your Grandma more often.

Here is the spiritual check I did last month. SpiritualHealthCheck by Trevor J. Partridge

It is easy to understand and is broken down in to different sections. Scriptural reading, stewardship, sharing your faith, etc. Its gives you a range from optimal to you still need to work on some things. It definitely provided some clarity and direction for me in 2018. I know I need to work on stewardship, sharing my faith and scripture memorization. If you can, find an accountability partner. Someone that is going to help you stay focused and accomplish these goals.

Proverbs 16-9

I know I want 2018 to be a better year than 2017 was and I know that I can accomplish that by giving God my goals. Actually praying about the goal or the plan Before I decide to do it, not after. Praying before allows God to help you formulate the best course of action and it is saying, I give this to you Lord, and I trust your process and results. Its not to late to decide the course for the year. I didn’t decide until May that I wanted to turn my 2017 around and I am so glad I did. Write out what you want to do and talk to God about it. The best thing about writing it all done is that you watch God do all things you asked him to do.