Happy Mother’s Day

Being a mother is the HARDEST job I ever had. I love it though. I love that it made me want to better myself. I love when I go pick him up from the babysitter and he gets the biggest smile on his face when I walk in the door. Every cliche you have ever heard about being a mother is absolutely true.

Truth Lying GIF by Tangina Stone
giphy.com

If your a mom, take what you need, not just today but all week. Don’t let mom guilt get in the way. You deserve to be celebrated. I limit myself all the time because of mom guilt and I am trying to work on it but it doesn’t always work out that way. If you need help ask for it. If you want to be left alone ask for that. Your partner and support system can not read your mind. I used think my husband was upset with me because I felt like he was “watching” my son a lot. I never asked him, I just assumed. It wasn’t true though and it wasn’t a lot really. I just created that narrative in my head. I work full time so I already feel like I don’t see him enough. He’s fine. He’s well adjusted happy toddler.

Don’t compare yourself to other moms, don’t compare your baby to other kids. I read this article that talked about are we expecting too much out of your child based on age. I certainly was. If you are doing the best you can that is enough.

Remember people are only showing their highlights on social media. Folks rarely show the bad times. Or if they do, they show it in funny ironic ways. They don’t show when their kid has destroyed all the books in their room, or dumped all the clean clothes out of the laundry basket, or thrown their dinner all over the floor.

Your feelings count, your happiness counts, if you aren’t taking care of yourself then you aren’t able to be the best mom you can be.

Is your kid happy, healthy and loved? If they are then you are doing amazing! I salute you this Mother’s Day.

You Got This Go Get Em GIF by Shalita Grant
giphy.com

Until next time,

Dominique

Hitting reset

Happy Friday!

First week of 2021 has been a week.

Do you wish you could hit reset?

Reset New Day GIF by INTO ACT!ON
GIPHY.COM

I do. I am. My week started off pretty rocky. It certainly started off rocky here in the United States. How did it start for you? You may have had some intentions that you were not quite able to stick with. I know I had planned on not getting on social media which I was doing fairly well with and then that exploded. lol. I saw several posts on people’s dry January plans had gone belly up or their fast on MSNBC was a wash.

It can suck to start something and so soon get off track but remember the good news. God’s mercies are new everyday. We can start over. I started today. I put timers on all my social media apps and I am replacing that with more writing and reading. I feel lighter.

So don’t get mad if you haven’t been able to attack your goals the way you wanted to. Start over. Its better to start again then get mad at yourself for messing up. I pray for my country, the United States and for you as well that we are all able to hit the reset button.

10 ways to have peace in turbulent times

  1. Start your day in prayer and devotion. This will set you up for success. You can give anything that you are worrying about to God and thank him for all he has done. You can walk into your day/work with a sense calm and strength. This way you can take on anything!
  2. Don’t get on social media during the work day. At the very least wait until after lunch.I know this can be hard because social media typically provides an escape but not right now. Too much is happening in the world.
  3. If you have to go on social media, stay out of the comment section! The comments are were you are going to see the wildest things. People have no chill in the comments and you don’t want to be a part of that. Its going to instantly make you mad.
  4. Remind yourself that you don’t have to teach everyone. We are dealing with adults on a day to day basis, you don’t have to school everybody. You can provide a list of resources and remind them that Google is free everyday.
  5. Consider the source. Before you go and get mad at some random person on the internet remember that they probably don’t know you personally and if they do, this the perfect opportunity to block them. I went and unfollowed a bunch of people that didn’t serve me anymore and it has done wonders to my timeline. I very rarely see things that I don’t agree with. I understand that it is important to see views that are different than my own. However, peace of mind is priceless.
  6. Pray. When do you come across something that makes you angry or frustrated. You don’t have to hold on to it. Release it back into the atmosphere. Ask God to help you get over whatever foolishness you just witnessed.
  7. Find something else to entertain you besides the news and social media. Ride a bike, walk outside, yoga. In the world of COVID-19 we are not able to be as social as we normally would, so now would be a great time to find a new hobby. If you can find something that is free even better.
  8. Journal. Writing how you feel about whats going on in the world is a great way to get it out. You can even write it down and burn it later. I talk about how cathartic it is to burn things in this post, Burn it away
  9. Reach out to a friend or family member to help lift your spirits. Being in a funk by yourself is never a good idea. You may not be able to see them in person but talking things out with someone is better than holding it in.
  10. Watch, read or listen to something funny or light-hearted that will lift your spirits.

 

20200615_181236.jpg

This my son LJ and my dog son Hunter. Don’t they look so peaceful.

I know that these are crazy times. Between COVID- 19 STILL running rampant in the streets and the many injustices facing Black people, its a lot going on right now. You have to choose how much you want to be dialed in. Its perfectly ok to step back, take a break, and re-calibrate. There will always be work to do but you can’t serve if you don’t have peace within yourself. That leads to burnout. We don’t want that. Your voice is needed.

Cover image from The Practical Path

What ways are you taking care of yourself right now? Is there anything missing from this list? Let me know.

Deleting Facebook friends

So I started deleting some Facebook friends over the last few weeks. I have mentioned before that while I love writing the subject matter can sometimes be raw for me, I’m revealing my flaws and my most personal thoughts. That isn’t something I necessarily¬† want everyone to see which is why I haven’t done a lot of advertising on Facebook. I started deleting people if I couldn’t remember how we met, their real name, or if their page had more negative content then positive. Lol

As I was going down the list though I noticed I was hesitating over some names than I probably should have been deleting. I didn’t though because their pages are entertaining. They always have interesting gossip or throwing shade, just all around messy.

God has been convicting me lately of some respectable sins. Respectable sins being sins that we tolerate. These things don’t bring honor to God but they aren’t “that” bad. The respectable sins I have been working on are swearing, gossiping and reading smut. I have gotten the swearing mostly under control. I quit reading smut cold turkey. That’s another post for another day. Gossip is hard though. I have always been fairly good about¬† not gossiping about people I know. I wouldn’t want people talking about me, so I generally don’t do it. However do celebrities count? If it’s on tv or Instagram does that count? If you are just a spectator are you still gossiping? Like they say on social media, often times I’m just here for the comments.

Mostly, I just want to be in the know. I know that isn’t what God wants though. I just started reading this book Respectable Sins by Jerry Bridges. I definitely feel like he is coming at my neck. I read this book probably almost 10 years in my college bible study group but it didn’t do anything for me then. As I am reading it now has tons of highlights. I will write another post to tell you all about the book and my thoughts. I am working on gossip but I know this going to be hard for me because its so easy to do. I will keep you guys updated on my progress. Spiritual growth is my big thing for 2018. There comes a time in your life when you want to stop asking God so much what can you do for me, and more how can I serve you?¬† Come join me on this journey, it should definitely be interesting.

Are there accounts that you need to stop following? Things you need to leave behind in 2017. Take this time to really assess where you want to be in 2018 and what is holding you back in your spiritual growth.