Tag Archives: attitude

New kid on the block

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I have been working in the same job for the last 4 years. I am a college counselor. I love my job and am I good at it. I recently made a move to a new school this year and it completely shook my confidence.

I have only been there a month but I have learned a lot of lessons in the last 30 days.

1. I don’t have anything to prove. I am good at my job and I don’t have to do it the same way the previous person did.
2. I can not be everything for everybody. I was literally running myself ragged trying to make every meeting, do every presentation, sometimes trying to be two places at once. It was unnecessary. I wasn’t giving anything 100% because I was trying to do too much.
3. I can make mistakes. I am not perfect and that is ok. Nobody is putting any pressure on me but me. I just need to relax and do what I’m good at.
4. Trust is a very interesting thing. I’m going to talk more about this in a later post. I don’t really know the team I am working with that well yet. I am used to being excluded from things and being left off emails so I have been just showing up places. I don’t need to, my counterpart hasn’t left me off anything. He hasn’t done anything for me not to trust him.

Being a new person is not easy for me, nor is change. When I first started it was hard. I was lonely and nervous and unsure of myself. 30 days later I feel more relaxed. I have made some friends and I am learning the lay of the land. This change is exactly what I didn’t know I needed. I am so glad that I didn’t block my blessing by being afraid.

Do you have the right spirit? (7)

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Offer sacrifices in the right spirit, and trust the Lord .
Psalms 4:5 NLT
https://bible.com/bible/116/psa.4.5.NLT

What are you trusting God for? Are you making any sacrifices? You all know that I have been trying to get pregnant for a while. I have definitely sacrificed a lot of things, time, money, vacations, jobs, my skin. I know all of us have made sacrifices as we attempt to accomplish our dreams.

As you are trusting God and making sacrifices are you doing it in the right spirit? I came across this scripture last night and it was a great reminder. God doesn’t just want our sacrifice, he wants the right attitude as well. Your sacrifice doesn’t mean much if your attitude is not right. Sacrifices suck while you are in the midst but you know everything is for your good. I say that a lot but it’s a good thing to remember while you are working toward a goal. When you get what you have been working toward it will feel much better if you had a good attitude along the way.

How do you know if your spirit is right? Are you complaining about every missed opportunity? Are you jealous of other people who didn’t have to sacrifice as much as you have to get to their goal? Do you only do a half job at one you are trying to do because you are tired of working towards a goal and seeing no results? I have some point have definitely done all of these things. Here is a prayer to help with that.

 

Image result for psalm 51:10

You can just pray that line and let God change your attitude. He wants to help us and he would rather we admit we need the help to change then grumble our way to accomplishing our hearts desires.

 

Keep that same energy

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I just got back from vacation and it was amazing. My husband knows how to show me a good time. It was exactly what we needed after having a rough winter. I love to travel, going places doing things, just being out of my house and doing something new. Research shows that it’s easier to get through your days if you are planning a vacation or have something to look forward to. Why is that? Shouldn’t we have joy in our day to day?

Keep that same energy is Teyana Taylor new album title. I haven’t listened to it but the title really got me thinking. How do you do that? Once you get back from vacation why is there such a plateau, such a crash? It literally has a name…post vacation blues. When you are on vacation there is such a high and when you get back home its like, uh, let me get back to the grind. I want to break that cycle.

When I got home I didn’t get all sad, like man my vacation is over. Instead I’m making the best of my time here. I’m taking that just go with the flow vacation vibe and carrying that into my work week. I dont want to be down and just waiting to leave again. I want to enjoy my time in my home and in my city, just like I do on vacation.

I want to keep that same energy. I want to be carefree and let the stress roll of my back.

How am I am going to do that?

1. Be here now- when I am vacation I’m not on my phone. I am just enjoying each moment. I will continue that philosophy when I am home, limiting my time on social media and group chats. This way I am in control of what I take in.

2. Quiet time- when I am on vacation I dont have to rush through my devotional. I really get good one on one time with God. It is harder to not rush my devotional at home but it can be done, I just have to be more intentional with my time.

3. Be active- if you can believe it, even though I did a lot of laying around on vacation I actually exercised every day too. Definitely not something I do at home nor will I necessarily be able to duplicate but I can get close. Being active puts me in a better mood than laying around. Instead of getting off work and trying to catch up on shows or social media and I am going to try to do some physical activity.

4. Try new things- best thing about vacation is trying stuff you wouldn’t normally do at home. That can be anything, new food, drinks or experiences. Why can’t we do that at home? I am lucky that I live in a city that I can find all kinds of new things. So once a month I am going to try and find something or someplace I have never been before.

I know none of these things are super hard but it is the small things that make vacation great. If I bring all the small things I like about vacation into my every day life then I can bring a little bit of vacation back with me.

Broken

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Broken-
having been fractured or damaged and no longer in one piece or in working order 

(of a person) having given up all hope; despairing.

I used to think I was broken using both definitions. That I was living a lie, that I was going out in the world and acting like everything was ok when it wasn’t. I felt like something inside of me was broken and could not be fixed. I had a hole in my heart that was irreparable. I tried a lot of this but nothing could fill it, not partying, not work, not my friends, not my husband, everything I was trying to do wasn’t working.

So in my last resort I turned to God. I’m glad I did. I learned I’m not broken. God made me this way. He has plans for me that are good. I didn’t always believe that or understand but I stayed in the word. It made a huge difference on my outlook in life. There is beauty in my brokenness. I wouldn’t have grown in my relationship with God if I wasn’t broken. Everyday is practice in reminding myself that I have to meet no one expectations but my own.

If you feel broken just know you don’t have to stay that way. There is a way out. You won’t be able to do it on your own, not long lasting. Getting out of your head and closer to God is the only long term solution and potentially seeing a therapist.

Updated: since I wrote the above words Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain have both committed suicide. This has sparked debate about what role does prayer and God specifically play in mental health. I think that God is our first resource in working on our mental health. Getting into your bible, prayer, fasting, meditating, it’s all an important part of the healing process. We can’t do it on our own and believing you can may be a fatal mistake. You need tools to overcome things you have been through. Seek help if you need it.

Patience

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Patience-the capacity to accept or tolerate delay, trouble, or suffering without getting angry or upset.

I haven’t really been writing this week because it’s been a pretty crappy week to say the least. It sucks but it happens. I spent time with my girls this weekend in a quick getaway which lifted my spirits a bit.

I saw the prompt of the day was Patience. Sheesh! I immediately felt that in my spirit and then the verse of the day from the Youverse bible is about patience.

I’m like ok God I get it. I’m working on it. I just feel like I’m always having to be patient. I’m listening to my girl Joyce (Meyer) and she said something that really struck me. Don’t try harder, get closer to God.

In bible study this week, Beth Moore talked about different types of patience.Patience with situations and patience with people. I find I moreso need patience with circumstances than people but Beth brought up a good point. God is testing your patience with people because he wants to bring something out of you that is holding you back from greatness.

God gives us patience in circumstances to see if we are going to act differently in the same situation. This really got me thinking. I don’t always act differently in the same situations. I am making more of an effort to do so after hearing this lesson.

I don’t want to keep going around the same mountain over and over. I want patience to do a good work in me until it is complete. Philippians 1:6.

Patience is definitely a challenge but there is good reason to wait well. I’m going to stop trying so hard to be patient and seek God more. That way, I am so focused on him that patience is my natural response things.

href=”https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/pa

Be Humble.

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cslewis

God does not like the proud. AT. ALL.

opposesproud

I never thought I was a person that had a problem with humility. I am not a bragger, I don’t take credit for others people work, I am not obnoxious. These are the things I think about when I think of person with a humility problem. As God has been working on me, I discovered that humility is a multilayered concept and once I start peeling back the onion that I wasn’t as humble as I thought I was. I was listening to Joyce Meyer the other day and she had this list of characters traits of people who are humble. Once I heard this list I knew I had some work to do.

Humble people:

  • Ask for help, don’t insist that things go there on way-I don’t ask for help because I don’t typically do things I don’t know how to do already.
  • Quick to forgive, slow to offend glad to wait on God for vindication
  • Patient and long suffering with weakness of other people- I work in a high school. I am not always patient with people weaknesses because I hate to see wasted potential. I have students who are in the top 10% of the class not doing anything and it makes me so mad, and then I lose my patience with them. I have to remind myself they are just children.
  • Peace maker and peace lover
  • Romans 12 never overestimate yourself, adapt yourself to other people
  • Knows when to be quiet- I do not know when to be quiet. I talk entirely too much which is not always a bad thing. I am the person that used to always speak first in group settings, but now I try 3 before me. I also try to make sure that anything I have to add is necessary and beneficial to the conversation.
  • First to apologize-I am certainly not first to apologize because I don’t always feel that I am wrong. My husband is always first to apologize even when it isn’t his fault, which makes me really upset. He is one the most humble people I know though.
  • See and admit own weakness-I see them, but its much harder for me to admit them. I am working on it though. I talk about that some in this post. Is fear of failure selfish?
  • Gives credit where it’s due
  • Happily servers other people
  • Very thankful
  • Quick to repent- I am now. I think my problem before is that I didn’t realize I was doing things that didn’t please God. I am thankful for conviction.
  • Treats everyone with respect

I stumbled across this post at the Godly Chic Diaries about humility and it made a lot of sense. She brings up another layer of this humility onion. I will be talking more about as I work through these different layers.

How humble are you? After looking at this list do you see some things you need to work on?

How to wait well

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I did not always wait well. I was angry at God and didn’t talk to him for a while. I was sad, bitter and jealous. I tried to bargain with God and as you can see none of that worked. I tried a lot of things but I never fully 100% threw my cards in with God. I finally decided that all the things I was or wasn’t doing, I wasn’t getting anywhere. I didn’t feel better and really I felt worse. Self care helped me a lot because it helped me narrow down how I was feeling and what I was going to do to change it.  I don’t look at self care as finding myself per se and more about being intentional about my relationship with God. I did need to block out somethings that were a distraction and start making different choices.

I had to really drill down and pay attention to the things God was telling me. Often times I feel like we have the answers but we are ignoring them because we want the answer to be something other than what it is. I read a lot of books. Two that were super helpful to me were, How to hear the Voice of God by Joyce Meyer and Wait and See by Wendy Pope.

wendy pope         joyce meyer how to hear

 

I wanted to make sure that the promise I heard from God was from Him and not from me. Knowing his voice is really key. We can put things on God that aren’t really from him. I started to read my bible more so I could find stories of situations that were similar to mine, that helped too. I also wanted to read my bible more so that I could recognize Gods voice. You know a person when you spend time with them, reading or listening to your bible is the easiest way to spend time with God. I started to notice some changes in how I felt, random verses would start popping in my head. I listened to more gospel music, so random songs would pop in my head but they would make sense. The verse or song would be relevant to what I was going through.

If you have been reading this blog you see that I have been trying to do more of what pleases God and less of what pleases me. I spent so many years begging God for a baby and not being content in the space that I was in, I’m sure he was tired of me. I am so glad that God is not like man.  I was sick of myself! I didn’t want to pray about it anymore especially when I knew that there were things I needed to work on. Recently, I have been working on getting myself off my mind as much as possible. If I am not thinking about me, then I am not thinking about what I don’t have. There is no room to complain or be sad if I am putting my energy towards something else. I have found things to fulfill me in the mean time, which has helped a lot. This blog has made a big difference. I have been volunteering at church more, something I haven’t done in years.

numbers 2319

 

I believe God’s word is true. I know that this will happen, but I don’t know when. I understand that faith is not about what you can see, that wouldn’t be faith. Hebrews 1:1. I know that God isn’t trying to hurt me by making me wait but trying to grow me into the person he wants me to be. 2 Peter 3:9.  I also know that is desire is from him because I have also asked him to take this desire away if it isn’t what he wants from me. His word backs all this up. I am so glad I have a reference I can look back on to make sure I am not crazy.

I am not sure what you are waiting on, it could be a job, a man/woman, a house, a new car, insert your thing. I’m not going to tell you its not going to suck to wait because that would be a lie. I will tell you that it will get better. If you decide to go in with God 100% you will not be disappointed. You will feel better but you have to stick with it. Just when you get tired and you don’t think you can do anymore, God will give you a boost. I know that to be true because I have been there. You don’t have to suffer alone..