Tag Archives: goals

Independence Day

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It’s July 4th. That is Independence Day in America. Freedom from Great Britain in 1776. Most people didn’t get freedom that day but that isn’t what this post is about.

How free are you? Truly. What shackles are holding you back from being the person God meant you to be? Are you free to be the best version of yourself?

Freedom isn’t just about political independence or the absence of physical chains. It’s also about mental, emotional, and spiritual liberation. Think about the limitations you’ve internalized. Are there fears or doubts that keep you from pursuing your passions? Do you feel confined by others’ expectations, or trapped in a routine that doesn’t fulfill you?

True freedom means breaking those chains. It’s about having the courage to follow your heart, to live authentically, and to strive for personal growth. It’s about forgiving yourself for past mistakes and believing in your capacity for change and improvement. It’s about embracing your unique journey and the person you are becoming.

So, on this day of independence, reflect on your own journey to freedom. Identify what holds you back and take the first steps toward liberation. Surround yourself with people who support your growth, seek opportunities that align with your true self, and remember that freedom is a state of mind as much as a state of being.

As you celebrate today, think about how you can make every day a celebration of your own independence and growth. Break free from the shackles within and step boldly into the life you are meant to live.

Can we have it all?

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Daily writing prompt
What does “having it all” mean to you? Is it attainable?
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Having it all means you have everything you want in life and there are no gaps. I unfortunately don’t think that you can have it all. There is a quote from Oprah that says you can have it all, but just not all at the same time. I believe this statement more. Everything costs and a person can’t be in more than one place at a time.

What is enough?

I feel like trying to “have it all” you are constantly chasing your tail because it’s never enough. You start making money, you want more money, you buy a nice house, then you want a nicer house, have one kid, folks start rushing you to have another. The goal keeps moving.

I don’t know about you, but I find it very difficult to give 100% at work, 100% to my husband and 100% to my kids, I didn’t add my other roles as a daughter, sister, friend.

I think trying to have it all can lead to burnout and unrealistic expectations.

Redefining “Enough”

Finding peace and contentment involves redefining what “enough” means to you personally. Here are some steps to consider:

  1. Identify Core Values: Determine what truly matters to you. This might include meaningful work, quality time with loved ones, personal growth, or health and well-being. Prioritizing based on your core values can help you allocate your time and energy more effectively.
  2. Set Realistic Goals: Instead of aiming for perfection in every area, set achievable goals that align with your values. Recognize that it’s okay to excel in some areas while maintaining a balance in others.
  3. Practice Gratitude: Regularly reflecting on what you are grateful for can shift your focus from what you lack to what you have. This practice can enhance your sense of contentment and reduce the constant desire for more.
  4. Embrace Imperfection: Accept that you cannot be perfect in all your roles. Allow yourself to be human, make mistakes, and learn from them. This acceptance can reduce stress and increase overall well-being.
  5. Quality Over Quantity: Focus on the quality of your efforts and interactions rather than the quantity. Deep, meaningful connections and achievements often bring more satisfaction than spreading yourself too thin.

“Having it all” might be an elusive goal, but finding a fulfilling balance is achievable. By redefining what “enough” means for you, setting realistic goals, and prioritizing your core values, you can lead a more content and balanced life. Remember, it’s not about achieving perfection in every role but about finding harmony and satisfaction in the journey.

Legacy

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What is the legacy you want to leave behind?

The legacy I want to leave behind is one of significance and impact. My pastor talks all the time about being significant vs being successful. Being successful is often about making a lot of money which is cool but I want to also change lives.

I want to leave behind words that will change people, that will inspire and encourage them to be the best version themselves.

I talk about God a lot on my blog and not because I’m some kind of Jesus freak but because I want people to know that to be the best version of themselves they need God to help them.

It’s not about rules and regulations but relationship with Him.

I hope my legacy is one of empowerment and growth, instilling confidence in people and leading them to God or back to him in a way that seems accessible in folks everyday lives.

I want my legacy to show people that if I can achieve my dreams, then they can too. It’s about knowing that with faith, determination, and the right mindset, anything is possible. My journey hasn’t been easy, but through the highs and lows, my faith has kept me grounded and driven.

Ultimately, I want my life to be a testament to the transformative power of faith and perseverance. I want people to see that true significance comes from positively impacting the lives of others, and that success is not just measured by what we gain, but by what we give. My hope is that through my words and actions, I can leave a lasting legacy that reflects the love, grace, and strength that comes from a life lived with purpose and faith.

I’m back

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Hello! This has been a long time coming. So much life has happened since I made my last post 10 months ago. It’s like I had a new birth of myself. One version of me had to die for this new version to be birthed.

I went back and looked at some of my old posts and they were dark. The interesting thing is that I don’t remember what was bothering me last September or what that was referencing. I was still on maternity leave but who knows.

Going from 1-2 kids was a huge transition. Shout out to all the moms cause whew this is hard work! I used to want three. Yea right! I don’t know how we would have managed that.

I’ve been working on some of the things we talked about, self care and positive self talk, perfectionism and over thinking.

I’ve discovered new things I’m interested in like minimalism. More on that later. I’ve been fine tuning my writing and listening to the LORD’s promptings. I read 100 books last year. Only 12 were non fiction so I’m trying to increase it that number this year.

I’m trying to be more vulnerable and I’m learning that it actually works when you do it.

I’m working on showing myself more compassion and realizing that I can’t solve everyone’s problems.

Im working on the mom wife balance. I don’t want to just be a good mom but a good wife too. We’ll get more into some marriage stuff later on as well.

Writing/blogging has always been on my heart and I’ve missed it but I had to get back to it in my own time in my own way.

I’m excited for what the second half of the year is going to bring and what I will share with you. Come check me out when you have some time.

Until next time,
Dominique

What I’ve been busy doing when I’m not writing. My family. Jesse, LJ, and James.

5 months left

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Happy August! Summer is almost over. Have you enjoyed it? Did you do all the things you thought you would?

As summer is ending it makes me think about the intentions and goals I set for 2021. A few of them I messed up. One being I wanted to post every month of the year. I missed June though. Its ok. I don’t plan on missing anymore.

One of my words for 2021 was intentional. I have been doing a better job with that. I’ve been saying no to things, I’ve been focusing on what’s important. I’m creating more time for myself. I’m giving myself more grace. I’m reading this book called Self Compassion by Kristen Neff. It has some really good stuff in it. Very helpful.

Where are you in what you wanted to accomplish in 2021? Have you had to modify your goal?

2021 doesn’t look anything like I thought it would. Covid is acting up again, student loan debt isnt cancelled, housing market is out of control

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Galatians 6:9 ESV And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.

As we enter into the later part of the year remember there is still time. Time to step it up, pivot or adjust if needed.

You are not accomplishing these things on your own. God is walking beside you cheering you on.

You got this!

Until next time,

Dominique

Have you noticed?

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If you have been paying attention you would have noticed that I haven’t been doing my post on Fridays in quite a while. I used to feel very guilty about that. I don’t anymore. Times change and that isn’t a realistic goal right now. I still want to make sure I post every month. That’s not something I have accomplished yet in my years of blogging. We are almost half way through the year and I have continued to meet that goal so I feel good about that.

I have been focusing a lot on my mental health over the last year. It has been good. I have made a lot of strides. However as we have often talked about growth is not a straight line and it certainly doesn’t happen on our own time. Over the past few months, I feel like everything I have learned has been put to the test and I can’t say I necessarily passed each test with flying colors.

I will say that I have tried my best. I do recognize that I need to give myself grace. I need to have patience with my own process. Its hard though. My old perfectionist ways just refuse to die!

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I had a lot of mental health stuff I wanted to discuss in April but it didn’t really happen. That’s ok. May is mental health awareness month so I will do it now.

It was hard for me to talk about mental health when I know I was sometimes running to my old coping mechanisms. There is space for that though. April was a good reminder that I am not a constant self improvement project. I don’t have to keep striving to the next thing. I can sit in this space and be satisfied with where I am right now.

I am enough, just because, I don’t have to be producing anything, I can just be.

I just want to remind you that, while you are growing and evolving, take time to celebrate that you aren’t what you used to be. Remember that God put everything inside you of that you need to be the best version of you. You are just peeling back the layers so it can be released. You are just fertilizing the soil so the seed inside of you can blossom.

Until next time,

Dominique

Hitting reset

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Happy Friday!

First week of 2021 has been a week.

Do you wish you could hit reset?

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I do. I am. My week started off pretty rocky. It certainly started off rocky here in the United States. How did it start for you? You may have had some intentions that you were not quite able to stick with. I know I had planned on not getting on social media which I was doing fairly well with and then that exploded. lol. I saw several posts on people’s dry January plans had gone belly up or their fast on MSNBC was a wash.

It can suck to start something and so soon get off track but remember the good news. God’s mercies are new everyday. We can start over. I started today. I put timers on all my social media apps and I am replacing that with more writing and reading. I feel lighter.

So don’t get mad if you haven’t been able to attack your goals the way you wanted to. Start over. Its better to start again then get mad at yourself for messing up. I pray for my country, the United States and for you as well that we are all able to hit the reset button.

200th post

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I have reached 200 posts! I am so excited. When I started this blog in 2017, I would have never thought I would reach 200 posts. I did. It was hard, scary, fun, nerve wrecking, I could go on and on but I loved it. Writing is something I always enjoyed since I was a kid but I didn’t know how I was going to pursue that as an adult. It was a dream, I put on a shelf. I am glad that I finally had the courage to pursue my dream and see where it could take me.

I have not had a year since this blog has been in existence that I have a post every month. I posted the second half of 2020. I only did a few posts in 2019 ( I was pregnant and had a baby). 2018 was my best year, 111 posts but I don’t think I posted every month. I don’t typically make resolutions but this year I will. Posting every month is a goal I am setting for myself this year.

I thank each and every one of you for your support. It makes me feel good that the words of my heart are able to impact so many people. People from all over the world read what I write and I am greatly honored by that.

I am excited to see where my writing will take me in 2021 especially because I am starting to take it more seriously.

I appreciate you all,

Dominique

Reflection

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The word I’m focusing on this week is reflection. 2020 was supposed to be the year of clarity. I remember everybody being so hype about 2020 coming, year of completion, year of clarity. Did those things happen for you? When I asked myself that question I had to say yes they did. 2020 did a lot of things for me that I certainly wasn’t expecting. I didn’t roll into the year feeling great. I didn’t feel grounded, I felt like I was just floating by trying to keep my head above water.

I went back and read my old journal from the beginning of this year and I had a lot of goals which I did end up accomplishing most of them. After reading my old journal, the biggest thing I noticed was that I felt a disconnect from God. I wasn’t feeling his presence. My emotions were very up and down. I also wasn’t going to church as much as I should and I wasn’t doing any bible study. I changed those things in the second half of 2020 for sure.

That’s the beauty in writing things down. January-March (pre-Covid) feels so long ago. I definitely feel differently about it now then I did when I was in it. While I felt a little lost going into 2020, by the time the end of December got here, I recognized I needed to make changes going into 2020. I wrote down all the things I wanted to do and I eventually did them. It just didn’t seem like they were happening fast enough. I didn’t really start implementing the changes I wanted to do until April 2020. I was forced to change because of Covid but it was for my good. Quality takes time.

I also made a vision board and found scripture to match up with the goals that I had. It was super helpful.

As we finally! finish up 2020 this is the time to reflect on what you have done and prepare for what you are doing next.

The great thing about change is that you don’t have to wait until the New Year to do it. You can start right now, today. Even if you only move a centimeter in the right direction. Its movement, it counts.

How to get out of your own way

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For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline. 2 Timothy 1:7 NLT https://bible.com/verse-of-the-day/2ti.1.7/17250

@marcinevin Twitter

When I look at this list I see a lot of things that I have done in the past or still continue to do. Do you see anything that you do?

Do you want to be better disciplined? Ask God to help. He gave self discipline to us as a gift when he gave us the Holy Spirit. Its inside of us waiting to be used, we just have to ask. Everything you need to be great is already within you.

I think all the things on this list boil down to Fear. Fear gets me every time. I’ll have an idea that I like but I will scared that it will fail, that people won’t like it, that its not good enough. God didn’t give us a spirit of fear. He tells us all the time to that he will be with us. If he is with us what do we have to be scared about? I’m sure you see all the time, do it afraid. My girl (in my head) Joyce Meyer, just wrote a book called Do it Afraid. I haven’t read it, but I’m sure its good. lol

That’s how you get out of your own way. Do it anyway. Stop trying to be in control of every moment. Stop thinking of the worst possible outcomes. Start thinking of all the things that could go right. Reward yourself along the way. Don’t stop just because it gets hard. If you get off track, get back on. Its never to late to start over, change your mind, switch it up. Be kind to yourself.

These are the things we have to do if we really want to tap into our greatness. We can’t do it on our own. You can’t stop years of wrong thinking by deciding to just start thinking more positively. We have to ask God to help us. To walk beside us. We need to tell him I’m ready. I’m ready for the challenge, I’m ready for the pain. I’m ready for whatever you want to give me, however you want to stretch me until I’m operating at my best capacity. Until I am doing what you called me to do.

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Prayer

Lord, You died for me to live life to the full. Your children shouldn’t have imposter syndrome we are daughters/sons of a king. Everything I need to be great you equipped me to do. Because you love me. You decided what you wanted me to do before I was born and then put together the entire thing while I was still in my mothers womb. Help me get out of my own way. Help me water the seeds of greatness you already planted inside me. Help me stay steadfast and rely on you, not on me. In Jesus name. Amen

Resources

https://thriveglobal.com/stories/tired-of-self-sabotage-how-to-get-out-of-your-own-way/ https://www.lifehack.org/articles/productivity/10-ways-get-out-your-own-way-and-get-things-done.html https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/living-finesse/202006/how-recognize-and-defuse-self-sabotage