Summer is coming to a end

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The summer flew by as it always does and now its September 1. I can’t believe it. This summer was definitely one of growth. I feel like I did less partying but I didn’t feel bored. The days seemed full. My birthday is in 12 days. It will be my Jesus year so I am excited about that. I’m fasting to prepare for my birthday as well. Get my mind, body and soul into gear. I have more thoughts on the Jesus year that I will get into as I get closer to my birthday.

My boss asked us to three questions that I think would be good for anyone to use as reflection for the end of a season.

What was the highlight of your summer?

Highlight of my summer was traveling, seeing Beyonce’ (twice!) and getting a new puppy.

 

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(Riveria Maya, Mexico June 2018)

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(Chicago, July 2018)

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(OTR II Cleveland, Ohio July 2018)

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(OTR II Columbus, Ohio August 2018)

(OTR II Columbus, Ohio August 2018)

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(Hunter James, July 2018)

His name is Hunter James and he is certainly a handful. He has definitely been a challenge but my husband and I have embraced him.

What are you looking forward to in the new year?

I’m looking forward to being a better version of myself. My best friend always calls it 2.0. I like that. I definitely want to do that as well. You guys would be so proud of me! I have really stepped out of my comfort zone in the last few months and the results have been amazing.

I want to continue to grow this blog, work on writing better and jazz up my website. My cousin who is working on being a brand ambassador said there is no “me” on my website. Which is true. At first I didn’t want it to be about me per se. I was worried about people wanting to know my business and using it to gossip. I didn’t want my message to get lost in talking about “me” all the time. I can see how the that would be impersonal though, so I added some pics 🙂

What are you happy to leave behind?

I’m happy to leave behind self doubt, self pity, self sabotage.

I doubt myself a lot. I may not say it out loud but I do a lot of second guessing and it can be exhausting. I want to be able to go with my gut, use discernment and be satisfied with a decision. I don’t want to replay conversations over and over again to see if I said something stupid, awkward or random. I want to pick out an outfit and just get dressed. Self pity is harder because it sneaks up on you. I can be moving along nicely and my mind will take me back some place that I don’t want to go or bring up a memory that from the past. Or have me worrying about things that have not happened yet. I don’t want to do that.  I don’t want to anyone else to feel sorry for me, so I’m certainly not going to feel sorry for myself.  Self sabotage is sneaky too. I sometimes don’t realize I am doing it until I am in the middle and realized that a better decision could have been made. Like I give up because I don’t see the results in the time frame I want.  Things don’t work that way, so I am just trying to remain focused and be patient. Rome wasn’t built in a day and Dominique 2.0 won’t be built in a day either.

HELLO SEPTEMBER

M.I.A

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I know I have been missing in action for a few weeks now. So many excited things have happened and I can’t wait to tell you all about them. I know I said I wouldn’t go a week without posting but it happened.

I am sorry. Although I don’t have any regrets. Sometimes I have to live life and not just write about it. Its been a good summer but, its about over so time to get back on the normal routine. Plus writing everyday for 31 days is a lot and I needed a break. lol. Don’t worry, come September I will be back on my 3 day a week schedule.

New followers don’t leave. I appreciate you coming. Check out some archives, I have over 100 posts!

Did you ever feel like you needed to take a break after a massive writing project?

p.s- Did WordPress do some updates? I don’t think I like them…

 

Brave

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Quite a few people have been coming up to me and calling me brave lately. Its funny because I never really feel brave. Often times I am the exact opposite of brave. I have come to a point in my life where I am afraid, but I am doing it any.

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I won’t say that confidence always follows but what I will say is that people recognize the good in me. I was nervous, I was vulnerable, I was worrying about being judged, however when it was finished it turned out well. I was told that I was doing a good job, that I had a gift. I don’t feel like the things I do are a gift, it just is how I am, so I discount it. I shouldn’t do that.

 

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The main reason I don’t want to do things is because I am afraid typically of the unknown. People are saying they can’t blog or talk about their problems because they aren’t brave like me. That’s not true. I don’t feel brave when blogging.

I don’t think it is something that I am going to be doing for years but for now it is something that I needed to do. I could no longer hold in it and journalling was not enough. Blogging can be very passive, especially when you use a platform that people have to find.

I feel liberated and validated through blogging. I know that many of things I go through I am not alone. It has helped me be more honest with myself and other people. Like the other day, one of my friends wanted to go to lunch. My fun money has been tight this summer because I am working part time and I told her that I couldn’t go because I didn’t have the money. The old me would never have done that. I would have went and spent the money and done without for something else later. That is small but its the growth that counts in that. My friend told me something personal things about her marriage and she said she was able to do that because of this blog. I appreciate that. She said she feels like she has to have this public persona because people don’t get it. I have lived that life so it makes sense to me.

I notice how other people are much more in tune with their feelings and even though they seem more anxious they also seem more comfortable in their own skin. Or comfortable being uncomfortable.That’s brave to me. That’s where I aspire to be.

I am doing better. We have these big social gatherings at work and I just don’t feel comfortable. Its just not the way I operate. I am much better in one on one or small group settings but instead of sitting there and worrying about what I was going to say, I decided to remove myself from the situation. It worked out much better. As I drove home today I didn’t have to replay everything I said to make sure I didn’t say something stupid or jerk like, etc. I am happy about that.

If you want tell your story you should. Its therapeutic. Being 100% Authentic is whats really brave. I don’t believe I do that 100% of the time but I am working on it. If I can do it, you certainly can as well. Don’t let fear hold you be back.

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Where to next

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Finishing a challenge , it makes it hard to see whats next. I really busted my hump to make sure I finished that challenge. I wanted to make sure each post was well written. Each one was not my best post, but I did try and I am proud of myself.

It feels weird to not number my post anymore, lol.

Some one asked me what I was going to do next and its a good question. I have a personal writing goal but I don’t know if I am going to share that one the blog. I want to write 100 pages by December 26. Part of that, is writing like no one will read it to give me the courage to actually finish it. So I don’t know if you all will get to read it or not. I will see once its done.  I will do a few periodic check ins just to keep myself accountable and monitor my progress.

I need a blog goal now. I am cooking a few things up in my mind but nothing solid yet.  I am also going to take a class from Blogging University and work on some of my old posts. Any suggestions? I am looking for ways to grow my writing and my blog so any ideas would be great.

Heres to the rest of the year!

Dominique

 

I did it!!!! (31)

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happy dance black girl

Its a big deal people!! I got it done. I am glad I did it, but I am also glad its over!! So much pressure, lol.

happy dance charlie brown

Thank you for reading every post, good, bad or ugly. I really appreciate it.

Best,

Dominique

What I gained from 31 posts in 31 days (30)

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  1. You all were right, every post did not have to be perfect and was not perfect. I didn’t throw any crap out there so I am satisfied.
  2. I got a bunch of new followers. What up new followers! I am excited for you to be here and move along side me on this journey called life
  3. Prompts don’t really work for me. I need to be ‘inspired”. I wrote out 31 prompts before I started this challenge and I only used about 5 of them. I don’t know what it is about having to hear something or read something to get me to write but the prompts just didn’t do it. Maybe my prompts were wack, lol
  4. I need to free write more often.  I should be writing everyday or every other day. The free write really helped me get ideas to write about much more than having the prompts.
  5. The WordPress community is so supportive. I am very appreciative of that.
  6. There is a lot of really cool stuff out there. As I was trying to find more post ideas, I ran across a lot of interesting blogs. I knew this before of course but taking some time to read and not just write, really opened my eyes.

The cost of being ordinary (29)

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Brene’ Brown says in her book Gifts of Imperfections:

Our culture is quick to dismiss quiet, ordinary, hardworking men and women. In many instances, we equate ordinary with boring or, even more dangerous, ordinary has become synonymous with meaningless.

I read this and immediately agreed. Nobody wants to be ordinary, basic, regular. In the world of social media, ordinary people are not getting second looks.

So many teens look at people online and think that’s the way it has to be. They want to be social media influencers, versus influencing people in real life.

Those folks who are considered ordinary get lost in the shuffle. People who go to work, take care of their families, go to school, do the general right thing get no recognition.

We can live our whole lives and not have anything extraordinary happen. That doesn’t discount us. It doesn’t make us boring or regular, or lame.

People are  chasing images of what they think life is supposed to be like when in reality it’s not that way at all.

Nobody celebrates the dad who goes to work everyday, the kid in college working hard. This isn’t sexy or cool.

We have to change the conversation. I have recently started seeing Instagram post giving props to the ordinary citizen. The every day hero. We need to start the conversation about what makes a person important. What gives them value? It certainly is not how many social media followers they have. What are they contributing to society for the greater good? These are the things that matter.

Is Jesus at the center of your goal (28)

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Is Jesus at the center of my goal? I believe so. I am not saying I want to save the world. I do however want to use the gifts that he gave to do good. I don’t want to waste any opportunity that I was presented to me. I want to be able to say I did the very best I could with what I was given. The bible says anything God is in can not fail. . This is a reminder for all my Christian bloggers who lose motivation because we may not have the followers that other blogs have, even though we are saying the same thing. People are being impacted by the words we write down. When you are changing lives their is no failure. I often times get caught up in likes and views but if even one person read what I wrote and was impacted then that is a win for God. Even if that person doesn’t believe if it got them thinking a little bit, then that is a win.  Don’t lose hope, for our work is not in vain. Its our job to plant the seed by being obedient and we can do that. Every little bit counts.

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I used to think that why would anyone want to read what I had to say. I wasn’t saying anything special or doing things that had not been done before. Then I realized, it hadn’t been done before, because my voice was needed. Your voice is needed as well. So write when you don’t feel like it. Write, even if you don’t think it is good. People will resonate with you because your story is important.

Do you want to he successful by the worlds terms or Gods?

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Who is helping you grow? (27)

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The godly people in the land are my true heroes! I take pleasure in them!

Psalms 16:3 NLT

https://bible.com/bible/116/psa.16.3.NLT

I came across this the other day and it was a great reminder. Who are the godly people you look up to? I’m not talking about just surrounding yourself with godly friends but actually having people around that help you grow. Do you have a Christian mentor? Do you go to Sunday school or attend a bible study? Who is helping you in your spiritual growth? Do you read books or listen to podcasts that help in your growth?

No person is an island and we all need help. The small group I am in, has changed my life for the better. These women have challenged me, inspired, informed me. They have made me a strong prayer warrior and Christian women. They have encouraged me when I didn’t think I could go forward.

If you are the smartest person you know, then you need a new circle. If you are the only person praying over your life, then you may want to get some new friends.

Easier said than done (25)

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Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.

Romans 12:12 NIV

This is the header on my website. I believe in this scripture but it’s quite another thing to actually do it. I can do some if these things and probably do them all separately but all at the same time? No sir. We need all three. You can’t get through any real trial or test without doing all of them.

I certainly have hope but I’m not always joyful. Joyful means you are always content regardless of circumstances. Psalm 63.

Is there one that is easier than another? Probably faithful in prayer. The bible says pray without ceasing. That I can typically do with no problem.

Which ever one you are still working on don’t fret. God will help you work on each one of them since he gave us the instructions in the first place.