The cost of being ordinary (29)

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Brene’ Brown says in her book Gifts of Imperfections:

Our culture is quick to dismiss quiet, ordinary, hardworking men and women. In many instances, we equate ordinary with boring or, even more dangerous, ordinary has become synonymous with meaningless.

I read this and immediately agreed. Nobody wants to be ordinary, basic, regular. In the world of social media, ordinary people are not getting second looks.

So many teens look at people online and think that’s the way it has to be. They want to be social media influencers, versus influencing people in real life.

Those folks who are considered ordinary get lost in the shuffle. People who go to work, take care of their families, go to school, do the general right thing get no recognition.

We can live our whole lives and not have anything extraordinary happen. That doesn’t discount us. It doesn’t make us boring or regular, or lame.

People are  chasing images of what they think life is supposed to be like when in reality it’s not that way at all.

Nobody celebrates the dad who goes to work everyday, the kid in college working hard. This isn’t sexy or cool.

We have to change the conversation. I have recently started seeing Instagram post giving props to the ordinary citizen. The every day hero. We need to start the conversation about what makes a person important. What gives them value? It certainly is not how many social media followers they have. What are they contributing to society for the greater good? These are the things that matter.

Is Jesus at the center of your goal (28)

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Is Jesus at the center of my goal? I believe so. I am not saying I want to save the world. I do however want to use the gifts that he gave to do good. I don’t want to waste any opportunity that I was presented to me. I want to be able to say I did the very best I could with what I was given. The bible says anything God is in can not fail. . This is a reminder for all my Christian bloggers who lose motivation because we may not have the followers that other blogs have, even though we are saying the same thing. People are being impacted by the words we write down. When you are changing lives their is no failure. I often times get caught up in likes and views but if even one person read what I wrote and was impacted then that is a win for God. Even if that person doesn’t believe if it got them thinking a little bit, then that is a win.  Don’t lose hope, for our work is not in vain. Its our job to plant the seed by being obedient and we can do that. Every little bit counts.

Image result for If god is in her

I used to think that why would anyone want to read what I had to say. I wasn’t saying anything special or doing things that had not been done before. Then I realized, it hadn’t been done before, because my voice was needed. Your voice is needed as well. So write when you don’t feel like it. Write, even if you don’t think it is good. People will resonate with you because your story is important.

Do you want to he successful by the worlds terms or Gods?

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Who is helping you grow? (27)

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The godly people in the land are my true heroes! I take pleasure in them!

Psalms 16:3 NLT

https://bible.com/bible/116/psa.16.3.NLT

I came across this the other day and it was a great reminder. Who are the godly people you look up to? I’m not talking about just surrounding yourself with godly friends but actually having people around that help you grow. Do you have a Christian mentor? Do you go to Sunday school or attend a bible study? Who is helping you in your spiritual growth? Do you read books or listen to podcasts that help in your growth?

No person is an island and we all need help. The small group I am in, has changed my life for the better. These women have challenged me, inspired, informed me. They have made me a strong prayer warrior and Christian women. They have encouraged me when I didn’t think I could go forward.

If you are the smartest person you know, then you need a new circle. If you are the only person praying over your life, then you may want to get some new friends.

Easier said than done (25)

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Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.

Romans 12:12 NIV

This is the header on my website. I believe in this scripture but it’s quite another thing to actually do it. I can do some if these things and probably do them all separately but all at the same time? No sir. We need all three. You can’t get through any real trial or test without doing all of them.

I certainly have hope but I’m not always joyful. Joyful means you are always content regardless of circumstances. Psalm 63.

Is there one that is easier than another? Probably faithful in prayer. The bible says pray without ceasing. That I can typically do with no problem.

Which ever one you are still working on don’t fret. God will help you work on each one of them since he gave us the instructions in the first place.

 

Quick and dirty (24)

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I am reading this book right now called The Gifts of Imperfections, by Brene’ Brown. In the book she has 10 guideposts to life. Her whole approach is not how to but why you make the decisions you make. They were so many nuggets in her book. It has been a long time since I connected with a book in the way I connected with hers. I saw myself in those chapters. I was really surprised.

The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You're Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are by [Brown, Brené]

One of the many things she said that stood out to me was when she said there is no fast way to do the work. She couldn’t give people a how to because it was a quick list of steps is not going to help you with long lasting change. A blogger that I follow, Aqua,  brought up this same topic in her post. She talked about why blogs with headlines like 10 Ways to Happiness got more likes than Christian blog posts that basically said the same thing.

I get it. Putting in the work is hard. I talked about in a previous post as well. I would much rather get a top ten things to do, or avoid instead of doing soul searching work that is difficult and takes a long time to show results. Most people don’t run marathons for a reason. We want Microwave Growth. I know at times I do. Brene’ talks about in her book, how that just doesn’t work, even when we want it to. I will be talking more about her book because it was so life changing to me. I think its great that other people are starting to get this concept as well. The more of us that talk about it, maybe more people will be willing to put in the work to change themselves and not go for the quick fix.

Doing the work (23)

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This summer is going by fast. I don’t feel like I have done as much partying as I did last summer. I had quite a breakthrough last summer in focusing on my self care and really doing the work to be a better person. I came out of that experience refreshed. I just start writing for my blog. I had good the goals or things I wanted to accomplish. God did all of them but one. You could probably guess which one that was. I was very pleased. I must admit though that list was pretty surfacey, superficial. It was mostly about partying and hanging out, having fun with my husband and my friends. I knew this year I would do the same thing. Make this list to God and ask him to help me do things that I wanted to accomplish. It was much harder for me to write it this time though.

I started this list in April, but every time I would sit down to write it, I just couldn’t do it. I would stumble and stutter and end up talking to God about random stuff, not what I really what I wanted to do. I couldn’t understand what was taking me so long why i just couldn’t spit it out. Part of that was because if I really asked God for something and worked on it and he didn’t do it I would be faced with disappointment yet again.

I just didn’t think that I could do that again. God’s track record is proven. So I decided to go for it. Knowing that I need to put the work in. I always thought that if I put the work in that I would be trying to help God.

That just isn’t true. He doesn’t need my help, he needs effort. Effort can be difficult when you aren’t seeing results, but that is where true perseverance comes in.

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I gave God my list and I started putting the work in. It has certainly been harder but also more rewarding. I am making long lasting changes. Changes that aren’t just a change in action but a change in thought process, with action to back it up. Its been a challenge but I feel good. I have definitely grown this summer and taken some steps back. Change is not a linear process. I couldn’t always say that.  Growth is also recognizing that things take time.

What-success-looks-like

Stream of consciousness (22)

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Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “T, tea, tee.” Theme your post around “tea” or “tee,” or find a word that starts with “T” and talk about that. Bonus points if you manage to incorporate all three. Enjoy!

Since I am not allowed to plan out what I am going to say, the first word I think of when I think of T is time. I didn’t want it to be time because I feel like I do a lot of thinking about time. My pastor says the thing that you think about the most is what your focus is on. I wish my focus wasn’t on time so much. I want to be able to live a normal life, drink tea with my friends, or maybe even go play a little tee ball with my coworkers. I do most of those things more or less, but when I start digging down deep into my feelings, the first thing that comes up is this baby or lack there of. How long must I wait? How much more time needs to pass before it happens? What else do I need to do? I want my first thought not to be about getting pregnant. I want my first thought to be about something random like the cost of white tees at Target. Or does Flattummy tea really work? I don’t know. I just don’t want to be so pressed. I can’t help it though. This feeling of desperation that I am running out of time, is constantly in my thoughts. I probably think too much. That’s the real problem.

This is from lindaghill.com and this is my first Stream of Consciousness  https://wordpress.com/read/blogs/38812713/posts/11582

 

Here are the rules:

1. Your post must be stream of consciousness writing, meaning no editing (typos can be fixed), and minimal planning on what you’re going to write.

2. Your post can be as long or as short as you want it to be. One sentence – one thousand words. Fact, fiction, poetry – it doesn’t matter. Just let the words carry you along until you’re ready to stop.

3. I will post the prompt here on my blog every Friday, along with a reminder for you to join in. The prompt will be one random thing, but it will not be a subject. For instance, I will not say “Write about dogs”; the prompt will be more like, “Make your first sentence a question,” “Begin with the word ‘The,’” or will simply be a single word to get you started.

4. Ping back! It’s important, so that I and other people can come and read your post! For example, in your post you can write “This post is part of SoCS:” and then copy and paste the URL found in your address bar at the top of this post into yours.  Your link will show up in my comments for everyone to see. The most recent pingbacks will be found at the top. NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, such as Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

5. Read at least one other person’s blog who has linked back their post. Even better, read all of them! If you’re the first person to link back, you can check back later or go to the previous week by following my category, “Stream of Consciousness Saturday,” which you’ll find below the “Like” button on my post.

6. Copy and paste the rules (if you’d like to) in your post. The more people who join in, the more new bloggers you’ll meet and the bigger your community will get!

7. As a suggestion, tag your post “SoCS” and/or “#SoCS” for more exposure and more views.

Lessons from 100 posts (21)

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  1. Blogging is more than writing. I have read this a few times from various places. Its not that I forget but writing is already so much that I don’t take as much time out for the other stuff. I’m not writing for money or anything like that. I do want people to read what I write though. I want a website that is pretty to the eye as well as the words being good. People certainly judge a book by its cover.
  2. You also need to consistently read other people’s work and comment on their posts. I have had so much going on that I haven’t been reading much on WordPress. I haven’t been engaging in my blog as much as I was earlier this year. I noticed the visible difference. I noticed that when I read other people posts it drives them to my blog. This sounds like common sense but until I did it myself, I didn’t take it seriously.
  3. Sometimes its better to start something and do research later. This sounds weird as I write it because it goes against the very person I am. I am a classic researcher. I love gathering information. I read a lot of posts about the top ten things to do to get your blog to grow. Lately I have been reading books on how to write, how to start, etc. That research was helpful but it also delayed me. It was a stall tactic and  I didn’t really “get it” though. It is much more clear now that I am in the midst actually engaging in what I am trying to do. I can see the actual real time happenings of this advice.

 

100th post (20)

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Capture100

I can’t believe I’m here. I thought it would take me longer but 31 posts in 31 days (1) helped get that done. I never thought I would get a 100 strangers to read my story or anything that I write down. I have big writing goals. I have been listening to books on how people write and when they got started. I don’t feel so behind. I have so many ideas, I just need to pick one and start writing. I’m all over the place, fiction, non-fiction. I haven’t found an idea I really wanted to start.

I wrote 87 of my posts in 2018, which is crazy to me because I published my first post in October. I count that as my true anniversary not June when I purchased the domain.

I asked about classes or training and I got some good info that I will be checking out. I’m excited to take the next step. It’s comforting to hear writers you really respect say, “I threw away 4 books before I had one good enough to publish”. – Janet Evanovich

I know that I’m on the right track. I just need to do it. Failing is so hard and not something I do often. I don’t fail often because I don’t like to do things I where I am not great. I hate to be one of those people that talk about writing a book but never do it. I don’t want fear to hold me back. What’s the worst that could happen? If nobody wants to read it, at least I finished it. That is a big deal. It doesn’t have to be perfect and I am ok with that.

Free write(19)

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I did my first free write today. I see why people say dance like nobody’s watching. I never really understood that phrase until now. It is so much easier to sit down and write when I am doing it like I expect no one to read it. I see why everyone says don’t be so worried about perfect and get it on the page. I see why there is something to accomplish, something to be said about someone that finishes a book even if it isn’t good. Writing takes courage, hard work and discipline. I understand now why some people don’t believe in it. Others would say that its an excuse when people say they have writers block. Or you can’t get started writing because you don’t know how. I am making excuses about not writing this book.

I gave my self a writing goal for the end of the year. Its progress. I am so excited for this first step. Its a tangible step. I did a lot research, read a lot of books but I hadn’t seriously  written anything. Setting a goal is a big deal for me because I am very goal oriented. It will push me which is what I need.

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Thank you so much for your support.

 

Dominique