“They swarmed around me like bees; they blazed against me like a crackling fire. But I destroyed them all with the authority of the Lord.”
Psalms 118:12 NLT
I had a dream earlier this year that I was getting swarmed by bees. Think Thomas J (Malachi Culkin) in My Girl (1991) (trigger warning if you click the link)When I woke up I asked God what did this dream mean and he pointed me to Psalm 118:12. I had never paid attention to it, even though I have read it before. I didn’t think that I was stressed because I was just keeping my head down and getting things down. But if I took a few minutes to think about it, I guess I did know I was stressed. I’ve been overwhelmed by my house for a while. Having two active little boys doesn’t help in keeping the place clean. I have been doing some research on minimalism and decluttering. In my research I discovered that clutter impacts your mental health. I find that very interesting.
We talked last week about clutter and how I’m moving to get rid of some physical things to improve my mental health. The more I think about it though, I probably need to let go of some internal things to improve my mental health as well.
As I reflect on this, I realize that clutter isn’t just about the physical space around us. Yes, having an organized and minimalistic home can significantly reduce stress and create a sense of calm. But there’s also another layer to consider: the internal clutter. Our minds can become overwhelmed with thoughts, worries, and unresolved emotions, much like our homes can be overwhelmed with physical items.
In my journey towards being minimalist adjacent, I’ve come to understand that letting go of physical clutter is just the beginning. It’s equally important to address the internal clutter that can weigh us down. This includes letting go of negative thoughts, past regrets, and emotional baggage that no longer serves us.
Having two active little boys, my days are often filled with chaos and noise. It can be challenging to find a moment of peace and quiet, let alone maintain a tidy home. But by focusing on decluttering both my physical space and my mind, I hope to create an environment where peace and order can flourish, despite the inevitable messes that come with raising young children.
I’ve found that taking small, intentional steps each day towards decluttering helps significantly. Whether it’s setting aside a few minutes to clear out a drawer, or taking a moment to pray and release any lingering stress, these small actions can make a big difference.
As I continue on this journey, I’m reminded that decluttering is not just about creating a cleaner home, but also about fostering a healthier mind and spirit. By letting go of both physical and internal clutter, I hope to create a space where I can thrive and find joy in the everyday moments and I hope you are able to do the same..
Tag Archives: challenges
To my educators in the final stretch
Hey there!
I know you are tired. I know you have been working hard. I know it feels like the kids are more aphathetic than ever. I get it. It’s hard to care about wanting them to succeed more than they do. It’s hard to go over the same information over and over again to fall on death ears.
When times get rough and burnout seems eminent, try to do this. Remember your why. I know that seems simple but take a few minutes and think of your successes.
Of that kid who you had to drag across the finish line but they come back now and see you and they are a functioning member of society. You helped do that. Think of that student that hated school but now has a college degree. You helped do that. Think of that student who got out in the real world and decided they might want to make some different decisions about college and career. You helped do that too.It may feel like what you are saying is falling on deaf ears but the seeds you plant now will harvest later. One of my old students came back five years after graduation so I could help them. You are a now a trusted resource for years to come. Take pride in that.
Less than 2 weeks and seniors across the country will be graduating. When is the last time you had a day off? Spring break? When is the last time you had some self care? Have you had a minute to breathe?
You can’t pour from an empty cup. Take some time to yourself and reflect on all the good you have done. I know the bad things stick out but you wouldn’t do what you do if there was more bad than good. When a kid asks you the same question you already answered for the 30x take solace in the fact that he will probably be running some cooperation one day.
If you can, take the summer rest, relax and recharge. The work you do matters, the students you serve matter, you are doing a job that not everyone can or wants to do. Your hard work will pay off even if you can’t see it right now. Who know’s maybe someone will name a fictional school after you.
Until next time,
Dominique
Moving through grief
I wrote this post in August 2022
I started and stopped this post several times, but this time I finally finished. I’m sharing this so you may have some insight in why I have been so sporadic in my posting over the last few years.
Grief is such a hard emotion to process. It was especially hard for me to process because I had no experience. I have never lost anyone before who wasn’t old. Losing those people was hard but I found solace in the fact that they lived long lives and it was time for them to go home.
I have suffered two loses in 2021 and 2022, less than a 6 months apart and it has been difficult. My favorite uncle passed away right before my birthday unexpectedly. It was awful. I can’t even drive to my hometown without thinking about him. ( this has gotten better) He taught me how to drive. I think about him randomly all the time. I didn’t even manage to get through this post without crying and I hate crying. (Didn’t make it this time either lol)
My mother in law passed away when she was young. I was even younger and she was the first, “young” person I knew that had passed away. I wasn’t caught in my own grief though I had to help my husband in all the practical ways that come when someone dies. She died in November and I don’t think I felt the pain of her death until her birthday in February, which was months later. It will be ten years this year and sometimes it still feels like it just happened.
I tried to write this months ago but I couldn’t. It’s wild because in the time it took me to stop and start this another one of uncles passed away. He was sick but I know plenty of people who have cancer and get better right? He didn’t. We went from a family of 4, down to 2 in 5 months.
I didn’t think I had the right to be sad, not like my mother who lost 2 of her older brothers or my brother who lost the only father figure he knew. Or my grandma who lost 2 kids back to back. But we had our own special relationship too and that should honored. Its so hard losing someone in pandemic times. Everyone is losing or lost someone. I didn’t want to burden anyone because it’s been hard on everybody. I feel better now. Mostly. (Even better now)
I haven’t really been able to write and I was wondering why? It has been a very hard year. Some ups but it feels like a lot of downs. Through all of this I have been grateful because God has kept me.
I try to write posts that are informational or encouraging or motivating but today I dont have any of that. I will say if you are grieving you will eventually feel better. (I do feel better)
Do you really believe it will happen?
Then Jesus said to the disciples, “Have faith in God. I tell you the truth, you can say to this mountain, ‘May you be lifted up and thrown into the sea,’ and it will happen. But you must really believe it will happen and have no doubt in your heart. I tell you, you can pray for anything, and if you believe that you’ve received it, it will be yours.“
Mark 11:22-24Do you? What are you asking God for, a relationship, a job, a business plan, a book? Do you truly believe that he will help you or are you allowing past experiences to color your experience with God? Has God ever not come through? I know I’ve been disappointed by some of His decisions. However I could see the good in them. I know his no was for my protection. I know God isn’t setting me up to fail and I know he won’t play me.
Who are you going to believe? Your doubts and circumstances? Or are you going to believe the One that cannot fail? We talked about telling God what you need. Have you asked him to increase your faith? Ask him to help you in your unbelief. He doesn’t get angry when we do that.
Prayer: Father I pray for all of us who struggle to believe your promises. I pray that you help us in our unbelief. Help us wait on you and trust tour timing. Help us remember everything is for our good because you love us. Remind us there is a time for everything and hard seasons don’t last. Please lighten our load so we can focus on you. We thank you for having good plans for us and wanting us to prosper. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.
God is not a man, so he does not lie. He is not human, so he does not change his mind. Has he ever spoken and failed to act? Has he ever promised and not carried it through?
Numbers 23:19 NLTWhat do you mean, ‘If I can’?” Jesus asked. “Anything is possible if a person believes.” The father instantly cried out, “I do believe, but help me overcome my unbelief!
Mark 9:23-24 NLT
I’m back
Hello! This has been a long time coming. So much life has happened since I made my last post 10 months ago. It’s like I had a new birth of myself. One version of me had to die for this new version to be birthed.
I went back and looked at some of my old posts and they were dark. The interesting thing is that I don’t remember what was bothering me last September or what that was referencing. I was still on maternity leave but who knows.
Going from 1-2 kids was a huge transition. Shout out to all the moms cause whew this is hard work! I used to want three. Yea right! I don’t know how we would have managed that.
I’ve been working on some of the things we talked about, self care and positive self talk, perfectionism and over thinking.
I’ve discovered new things I’m interested in like minimalism. More on that later. I’ve been fine tuning my writing and listening to the LORD’s promptings. I read 100 books last year. Only 12 were non fiction so I’m trying to increase it that number this year.
I’m trying to be more vulnerable and I’m learning that it actually works when you do it.
I’m working on showing myself more compassion and realizing that I can’t solve everyone’s problems.
Im working on the mom wife balance. I don’t want to just be a good mom but a good wife too. We’ll get more into some marriage stuff later on as well.
Writing/blogging has always been on my heart and I’ve missed it but I had to get back to it in my own time in my own way.
I’m excited for what the second half of the year is going to bring and what I will share with you. Come check me out when you have some time.
Until next time,
Dominique
Lessons learned as mom of 2
I originally wrote this post September 10, 2022. It seems appropriate to post now that my youngest is now 1.
I have (mostly) let perfectionism go. When I had my older son I was still all about making sure my house was clean as possible, that I always looked presentable, that the baby looked presentable. This time around all that is out the window. My in laws came to see the baby and I ran out of time to clean everything, welp you get what you get.
Babies arent as delicate as you think. This younger one is definitely not being treated with kid gloves like the older one was. He’s good lol
It really is easier the second time. Having the gift of experience did wonders for my anxiety.
People will help if you ask them but you gotta be specific. We’ll talk about this more but telling people exactly what we needed has made a big difference.
Take the time you need. Your partner surely will.
Mom guilt is 2x stronger. I often feel like there is only so much of me to go around and everyone wants a piece. How do I combat that? Honestly I’m still figuring it out.
You can do hard things. Im breastfeeding this time and it has been going a lot better. Last time was so difficult and I gave up too soon. This time even though he didnt latch in the hospital, I decided to try again once we had been home about a week. He latched! I was so surprised. We just kept working at and we have been more successful.
Trust the process. I used this with breastfeeding. If you have breastfed or seen it happen you know can’t tell how much the baby is getting. When I was pumping before he latched I knew exactly how much he was getting. Now that its straight from the tap its harder to tell. I know there are signs to look out for but that doesn’t really help in the moment. For now I will take it one feed at a time.
Take things one day at a time. I’m a planner by nature and I had all these lists that I wanted to get done while I’m on maternity. I felt better this time sooner so I wanted to be productive. Nope! Keeping this baby alive is all the productivity I need for a while.
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Don’t forget your partner. Now that I have two children, my marriage ended up taking a back seat. My baby is one year and my husband and I went a long time this year without any real dates or consistent quality time. We had to have some hard conversations before we really started being intentional with one another again. Its easy to forget him, not because he isn’t great, but because I am trying to make sure that everything is done well and these kids are still alive, I don’t always prioritize the other adult here. That’s not fair to him. We will definitely talk about this more because its a work in progress.
The jump from 1 to 2 was crazy. I used to want three kids. What was I thinking?! I know people who have 3 or more kids so it can certainly be done. But having those kids out number adults just seems so hard to me. Now that I have two, I’m good. Now that my baby is 1 its easier, but when he was fresh, it was a lot of work.
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Don’t forget the self care. I am the first to admit I didn’t do well with self care this year. I know better. I haven’t read as many books, or had my quiet time, or written like I like too. But I will, I have the second half of the year to clean it up and I have started to. I got a massage, took myself to dinner, spent time with friends. I am getting there.
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You can do things a different way. My quiet time doesn’t look the same and hanging out with my girlfriends doesn’t look the same but that’s ok. As long as its happening, that is what counts.
Remember while you are being a mom, that you are also a wife, a friend, a daughter. I have the two children that I prayed for and it hasn’t always been easy but I wouldn’t change anything. Being a mom is the most rewarding and challenging thing I have ever done. Don’t lose yourself in your children, that’s not doing anybody any good.
Are you mom of 2 or more? Any advice or tips? Are you thinking about having more than one kid? Lets chat in the comments.
Until next time,
Dominique
A Birthday Prayer
I pray that this is my best year yet. Abba, You promise that there is sunshine after the rain. I pray that you continue to walk in front of me and behind me. I pray every hurt while challenging will be for my good and that I see your goodness in the land of the living. I pray that it’s true that each year we grow wiser and that I won’t repeat the same mistakes. I pray that you show me how to tap into your unlimited resources. That I have the strength to walk away from what’s not good for me. I pray for an abundance of love, joy, peace, strength and wisdom. I definitely feel like I have suffered a little while, I am ready to be restored, supported and strengthened. Abba, I trust that each year you are moving me closer to my purpose and that I am walking in the plans you have for me. I thank you for keeping me and your ways being higher than my ways. In your sons name, I pray. Amen.
In his kindness God called you to share in his eternal glory by means of Christ Jesus. So after you have suffered a little while, he will restore, support, and strengthen you, and he will place you on a firm foundation. 1 Peter 5:10 NLT
My birthday as always was great, it just felt like a little black cloud was following me around. I know trouble doesn’t last always. Praise God!
Until next time,
Dominique
Is God tired of my prayer?
Have you never heard? Have you never understood? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of all the earth. He never grows weak or weary. No one can measure the depths of his understanding. Isaiah 40:28 NLT
God will never get tired of your prayers. He isn’t like us. He is slow to anger. Time to God is not like time to us. He wants us to be persistent. You can ask the same thing as much as you want. Continuously praying keeps you focused on him.
Is this how you think God is listening to your prayer? Shaq might be irritated but God isn’t.
As you continue to pray your prayers will shift because you can’t be in constant communication with God and not be changed. Its not possible.
If you are going to have peace, you have to stay focused on God. When you stop praying the discouragement sets in. That’s why we are told to pray without ceasing.
Does God say stop praying if we don’t get what we want? From my research I don’t think he does. Maybe you need to change the question. But staying in constant communication with the Lord about your troubles, fears, desires is never a bad thing.
So I say to you, ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. 10 For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened. 11 If a son asks for [a]bread from any father among you, will he give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will he give him a serpent instead of a fish? 12 Or if he asks for an egg, will he offer him a scorpion? 13 If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask Him!” Luke 11:9-13
Somebody once said to me when I was praying for a baby, “maybe God wants you to pray for something else or he is tired of that prayer”. At the time I followed that advice but looking back, I don’t think that was true.
There are no examples in the bible of God telling people to stop praying. Or pray about something else. Joyce Meyer says get yourself off your mind. I don’t think that is a bad idea. Getting myself off my mind definitely helped me stop feeling sorry for myself. But I wouldn’t say stop asking God for that thing but make sure you add in other peoples prayer requests as well.
Here is a story of in the bible a persistent widow. Jesus told this story in Luke to remind us to be persistent. If that terrible judge didn’t care about anyone gave that woman what she wanted, what would our father in heaven do?
The Parable of the Persistent Widow
1Then Jesus told his disciples a parable to show them that they should always pray and not give up. 2 He said: “In a certain town there was a judge who neither feared God nor cared what people thought. 3 And there was a widow in that town who kept coming to him with the plea, ‘Grant me justice against my adversary.’
4 “For some time he refused. But finally he said to himself, ‘Even though I don’t fear God or care what people think, 5 yet because this widow keeps bothering me, I will see that she gets justice, so that she won’t eventually come and attack me!’”
6 And the Lord said, “Listen to what the unjust judge says. 7 And will not God bring about justice for his chosen ones, who cry out to him day and night? Will he keep putting them off? 8 I tell you, he will see that they get justice, and quickly. However, when the Son of Man comes, will he find faith on the earth?” Luke 18:1-8
Remember to not put human characteristics on God. Keep talking to him, keep persisting, just remember to pray for other people in your situation as well.
Until next time,
Dominique
Resources
https://bible.com/bible/116/isa.40.28.NLT https://www.gotquestions.org/pray-repeat.html
3 Reasons to Keep Praying About the Same Thing
Is God Mad at Me?
The short answer is NO.
I know it may feel like that sometimes, or even a lot of times depending on what you may be going through. I know when I couldn’t get pregnant, I thought God was mad at me for being selfish, or mad at me for not following instructions, or mad at me for not doing enough.
I have friends who think God is holding a grudge against them from some sin they committed years ago but that isn’t true either.
The Lord is compassionate and gracious,
slow to anger, abounding in love.
9 He will not always accuse,
nor will he harbor his anger forever;
10 he does not treat us as our sins deserve
or repay us according to our iniquities.
11 For as high as the heavens are above the earth,
so great is his love for those who fear him;
12 as far as the east is from the west,
so far has he removed our transgressions from us.
Those verses are from Psalm 103. This was written by King David. A man after God’s own heart. He also committed adultery and killed a man to try and cover it up. Not exactly the actions of a person who is in favor with God. It’s true though. Even after the terrible things he did, God continued to bless him.
David points out some things we need to remember.
- The Lord is compassionate and gracious, SLOW to anger, abounding in love. The thing you think is mad at he probably isn’t. It takes him a long time to get mad. But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day. 2 Peter 3:8
- He does not treat us as our sins deserve, or repay us according to our iniquities. God isn’t petty.
One of my favorite verses is God is not a man, so he does not lie. He is not human, so he does not change his mind. Has he ever spoken and failed to act? Has he ever promised and not carried it through? Numbers 23:19 We put human attributes on God so we can better understand his greatness but sometimes that gets blurry. God isn’t trying to get you, he doesn’t want you to feel bad. There are consequences for your actions but they don’t last forever.
3. As far as the heavens are from Earth, so great is his love for those who fear him. If you know nothing else know that God loves you, a lot, a lot. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,[b] neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:38-39. Nothing can separate us from God’s love, nothing!
4. As far as east is from west, he has removed our transgressions. Think about how far east is from west. You can’t measure it. Its not possible. If you have asked for forgiveness, then you are forgiven.
Don’t let your circumstances have you doubting God’s character. Keep praying, keep believing, remember the promises he made to you.
We’ll talk next about how to remember God’s promises.
Talk to you soon,
Dominique
Inspiration
Hi friends,
Its been awhile. You’ve probably are wondering where I’ve been and what I’ve been doing. I told yall I got a new job back in July. It kind of took over my life. I been working for this promotion for so long when I got it I immediately went into overdrive. It was a busy time.
I got what I prayed for and I put God on the back burner. I had not planned on doing that, it just happened. I still read my bible and I still did my morning devotion but it wasn’t the same. I was more going through the motions.
I stopped going to my caregroup because I was working so late, I stopped getting up to do my devotional and writing in the morning because either I was tired from staying up late from working or staying up late just because I didn’t want to go to bed.
In doing all these things I didn’t feel inspired. I stopped being plugged into the power source. A few minutes reading my bible and writing out my prayers isnt enough to plug into the power source.
What inspires me?
Sermons I hear inspire me, but my church has been doing church online for almost 2 years now and its not the same, not an excuse but its not helping. It’s easier to not be engaged when you are not in person. I also don’t have the same sense of urgency because if I miss it on Sunday I can go back and watch it anytime, or so I would say.
Podcast I listen to inspire me too. However sometimes I just want to be entertained no message necessary.
Why haven’t I been listening to anything inspirational?
I think listening to inspirational stuff reminded me of what I wasn’t doing. As I am writing this I realize that feeling I was feeling wasn’t coming from God. He doesn’t condemn us, he convicts and there is certainly a difference.
As always he is slowly pulling me back in. I have been going to care group again and bible study. I needed it. I also haven’t taken on too much. That has been lingering in the back of mind. I don’t want to be stressed like I was last year around this time. I was starting to feel like I needed to slow down but I didn’t do it and it eventually blew up in my face.
November is National Novel Writing Month and I am going to be working on my book. It’s not a fictional novel but its a book so I am going to try and apply the same principles. At the very least it will give me some accountability.
Writing this book is something that I have been wanting to do for a while. I also know that writing is not always about feeling inspired, its also about consistency. I don’t know where the blog going land as I figure this out. I appreciate you sticking beside me.
Wish me luck,
Dominique
Always finding the silver lining 