Fret

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Fret-be constantly or visibly worried or anxious.

Evildoers is harsher than what I’m thinking however, I’m not excluding anyone. People who cut corners, people who step on other people to get to the top, people who don’t geniuninely deserve the good things they are getting. I am talking about them. Its hard to watch people who just skate by in life get things when you work super hard and don’t get anything. It just doesn’t seem fair.

Looking on social media, you see people get famous for doing nothing, while you have been working your tail off and nobody know’s your name. Don’t feel discouraged. It won’t last though. When you rise fast, sometimes you crash fast as well.

Roots have to be established and when things happen too quickly you can’t set down any roots. Overcoming adversity is what helps you when trouble comes. Trouble will come and those people who are winning won’t be prepared.

God is allowing to them prosper for a little while but it won’t last. Continue to work hard. Hard work will last, not scheming and getting over,so don’t get discouraged.

Inefficient

Inefficient-not achieving maximum productivity; wasting or failing to make the best use of time or resources.

Often times I think about the dreams and goals that I have and want to accomplish and I feel  inefficient. I certainly don’t feel like I am making the best use of my time or resources. I have two degrees that I do not really use and I’m starting to to get the itch that I want to do something else. Am I qualified?  Sometimes I think so, but other days not so much. I am debating on if I want to get an Ed.d, which is a doctorate in education because that is what I have been doing for the last 10+ years but I don’t know. I know to make any real money or move up, a terminal degree would be nice but I want a job that is bigger than money. Do I want to do something totally different? I didn’t get into my field to make a lot of money but I want to be comfortable. I don’t want to put all the financial heavy lifting to my husband. I have two degrees, I want to pull my own weight.

When I got my master’s there wasn’t a lot of asking God or contemplating. I did a little research, asked the higher ups around me and did it. I want to put a little more thought and time into my choice this time around. I don’t think having more formal education is what makes feel inefficient. I have to remind myself that his grace is sufficient. He is strong when I am weak.

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I probably feel this way because what I really want to do I have no formal training at all. I want to be a writer. I want to write books that will be read all over the world and be referenced for years to come. I can’t really imagine that happening in my wildest dreams. Why not? I haven’t even tried yet and I am already talking myself out of it. Nobody can make me feel inefficient but me. I know it won’t be easy but if I take one step, God will take two. I was not made to be inefficient or mediocre. I was created for his purpose. There is something inside of me that is waiting to be revealed and the only person that can stop me from reaching my full potential is me.