Praying for your enemies

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Sounds good right? Godly even but its a whole lot easier said than done. I have  a person at work that I have had some issues with. No matter how nice or helpful I am to this person it doesn’t seem matter. They are determined to make my job and work life miserable. I kept praying to God about what I should do but nothing was getting better.

In Psalms there are several references to enemies. David wrote most of them while on the run from Saul, or his son Absalom. One verse stood out to me, Proverbs 25:21-22, reap hot coals on their heads. Ok. I can definitely do that. Even with the scripture backing me, it was still hard to do. When I first started praying for my enemies I wanted to pray for them in a negative way. Lord, help them get their life! Help me not snap on them! Help them recognize their shenanigans. However, this is not what Jesus is instructing us to do. So I started again. I prayed for their success and everything they touch turn to gold. I have included this prayer at the bottom.

Once I did it, I slowly started seeing changes. That persons life was not going well, professionally or personally but they weren’t bothering me anymore. I couldn’t believe it. Once I stopped worrying about the situation, trying to get this person to like me, and just gave it to God, I saw real change. The solution was so simple and quick I wish I would have done it sooner. It was much better for me to pray for this individual, then trying to correct them or go toe to toe all the time. That was getting old. Let the Lord fight your battles. I see now exactly what that means and why God wants us to do it.

Prayer:

Lord bless Julie Smith (not her real name).Let everything she touches turn to gold. Let her hard work show great dividends. Let her be able to accomplish everything she wants and more. Let her really hit her stride this year. Let people who are out to get her be stopped in their tracks. Let her learn and see and grow and do more than she ever imagined. Help her with her insecurities and frustrations. Wrap your arms around her Father, show her that she is loved, that she is valued, that she is your child. Help her do her best and know that no one is out to get her.  Show her that who she is good enough, because she you made her in your image. Let her know that her talents, her skills, her being is making an impact in our work place. Ease whatever pain and confusion she is having in her heart. Bless not only her but also her children and her husband as well. Thank you father. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.

What’s in a name?

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Picking a name for something can be pretty difficult. We all know someone who makes you stop and scratch your head and think to yourself what were their parents thinking? Does the name get the point you were trying too make across? Not always. I know people who just settled on something because they were running out of time.

When I was picking blog names I was all over the place. I couldn’t really get across all I wanted to do in just one name. I also didn’t want my name to be title because it felt like too much exposure to fast.

The more I write, though, I feel a little torn. Did I pick the right name? This is on the heels that I will be going live soon. I should have asked someone but I’m not always good at asking for help and I didnt want any scoffers. If you are reading this then I have gone live and the name is there and sticks. I don’t dislike it, I picked it. I also prayed a long time about it before I decided on this. If God helps you do something you shouldn’t have any regrets about it. This very well could be me or the devil trying to delay my progress. Its taken me 6 months from purchasing the domain to publish. I wonder why?

If you look you will find a reason to talk yourself out of anything. Whats the reason you haven’t stepped out on faith? Too risky, not enough money, not enough skill, won’t work, not enough prep, no support? I have felt a lot of these same things myself but I told a girl, if God is in it you will not fail. I needed to be reminded of that. Stepping out on faith requires movement. You only can research and ponder for so long then you gotta move. I’m doing that. At this point, I’m more on the side of whats the worse that can happen. I know this isn’t as big a decision as should I quit my job or do a missionary trip in a foreign country but for me it was big. Im baring my soul on the internets. However as my friend says, I’m standing in my truth. I followed what God said not just my heart, so as I leap I know he will be there to catch me. If you take time to talk to God before you make your decision He will be there when you leap too.

WWJD

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Being the bigger person is hard. I guess that’s why its called bigger person in the first place. The bible says, die to self. That doesn’t mean when its convenient or when you want to, or only when the person is being reasonable. Its never convenient to put your own needs to the side especially when someone is being a jerk. Titus 2:12 instructs us to deny ungodliness and worldly desires and live sensibly and godly in the present age. Cussing somebody out or snapping back at them when they say something reckless to us or deciding to not talk to a person because they work our nerves, is not godly. We know this, but sometimes we need a reminder. I know I do. My friend told me to cuss them out and pray for forgiveness later, but that isn’t godly either. I often have to stop and think, what would Jesus do?

Its hard to think of what would Jesus do when the people around you aren’t thinking or acting like Jesus.  I’m always try to weigh out my options and rationalize the situation for my ungodly response. I know God also wants us to be genuine in our dealings. Do I do the right thing because its the right thing? Do I not do it because I truly don’t want to? I really don’t know. I can see both sides. Usually I push myself to do the right thing even when I don’t want to because I don’t want to disappoint God. I want him to feel like I am acting out the things that I read in his word. When you know better you do better.

I know you are thinking that there were times when Jesus would get mad, he even flipped tables in the temples court, (Matthew 21:12) but it was godly anger, not anger based in the flesh. I read this blog post at challies.com that talks about righteous anger. Ephesians says get angry but do not let it cause you to sin. What?! How are we supposed do that? What does that even mean? Righteous anger means you are mad about someone actually sinning not about someone making you angry personally.

I heard a girl on a podcast I listen to say that when someone doesn’t treat us in the way we should be treated that it is an opportunity to come to God and pray for that person. The person doesn’t realize what they are doing or the impact of their words and actions. I will talk more about praying for you enemies in a later post, but I will say it does work. I have to remind myself even when its hard that its important to extend a little grace. Its not up to us to decide when we want to be godly or loving to someone. Its easy to love someone when they are treating you right but the life we are called to isn’t always going to be easy. I will tell you it won’t always be like this. There is something to be said about doing the right thing when everyone and everything is screaming at you to do the opposite. I sleep better knowing I made the right decision.

We all fall short, everyday, but the more you do the right thing when you don’t want too, the easier it will become to continue to do the right thing when the choice comes to you again. What would Jesus do? He would extend grace, he would pray for the person, he would correct them in love. He would turn the other cheek every single time, even if he did not want to. The next time you don’t want to be the bigger person, stop and ask yourself, what would Jesus do. Hopefully, that will change your response. If not, you know you can always ask for forgiveness later.

For more information:

3 Marks of Righteous Anger

Scriptures reference:

Titus 2:12

Ephesians 4:26

Matthew 18:22

Matthew 5:44

 

 

 

Is fear of failure selfish?

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Yes. I didn’t use to think so, though. I felt like my lack of action, my deciding not to do anything was my business alone. It didn’t involve anybody but me and I wasn’t hurting anyone. I didn’t tell anybody my ideas because if it didn’t work out the only person disappointed was me. I can disappoint myself but I don’t like to disappoint other people. How many projects have you let pass by? How many jobs have you not applied to because you didn’t think you would get it? My pastor brought this up a while back and I never thought of it that way. Deciding that you are doing to hold back on your special skills, talents, gifts, perspective is definitely selfish. You are unique.  Whatever awesome thing you are good at that people can’t see you are keeping it from the world.

What’s your reason for keeping it hidden? My reason is that I want it to be perfect. I didn’t write this very blog for years because I held myself to an impossible standard. I wanted to be good right away I didn’t really want to go through the growing pains of first starting out. Most things I do, I do well, and with this being a new venture I didn’t want to do it if I wasn’t going to be the best. I don’t a lot of things I’m not good at for that very reason.  Its terrible I know. I’m working on it.

The funny thing is we weren’t called to be perfect. God is strong in our weakness. He feels in the gaps when we are deficient. Even if one persons life is impacted or changed by what you did wouldn’t that make it all worth it? This girl at work remembers this one line I said to her about stealing time. It was a throwaway line,  don’t even remember saying it. She does though, it has impacted her life. What if someone could remember you but for a positive? I don’t consider that event positive but I guess she will think twice about leaving work early. LOL.

What you have to bring to the table is important. Even if it doesn’t turn out 100% great you will have something to tweak and do better the next time. I still think like that sometimes. God was telling me to be a writer, to share my thoughts but I was caught up in the process. The when, where, how. Would it be a great success? Would anyone read what I had to say? I kept putting it off, doing research (my favorite) however at some point you just have to take the leap. God was literally making me miserable because I had not done what he told me to do. Writing was all I thought about, the words were pouring out of me but had no outlet. So here I am leaping. I hope you leap to. It won’t be as bad as you think, I promise and if it is, so what? What’s the worst that can happen? Good luck to you! Come back and tell me how it goes.

 

Encourage Yourself

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Talk to yourself how you talk to other people

I heard a sermon today where the preacher said watch your self talk. It really struck me. You would never talk to other people how you talk to yourself. We beat ourselves down with self doubt, self pity, and a host of other terrible things to keep us from living our best lives. If a friend came to you and said they had a great idea about something, even it is seemed a little outlandish, you would still encourage them right? I encourage people all the time. I typically am a glass half full person, but not when it comes to my own hopes and dreams. Its very easy to talk myself out of things.

Why don’t we talk to ourselves like that? Why are we are own worst critic? Remember that we are made in Gods image. He knit you together before you were born. Is that a hard concept to understand? Sounds good in practice but hard to do in real life. I used to do that, still do, build other people up but tear myself down with worry, doubt and insecurity. Then I decided to start telling myself all the things I say to other people. I’m the bomb.com, I can do anything I put my mind too, people want to hear what I have to say. I also went back and read who God is. I reminded myself that I was his child, made in His image, He certainly had enough power to help me if I tapped into it. How often do we rely on our own power and not on God’s and then wonder why our plans don’t succeed? Its not because we suck or it was never going to happen, but because we forged ahead without Him. So if you are reading this and want to stop downing yourself remember that you are a child of God and He wants nothing but for you to be happy, successful, content. You don’t have to beat yourself up there are enough people in the world to do that, the media, the president, don’t do it to yourself. Every time a negative thought pops in your head, replace it with a positive one. Put positive affirmations on your bathroom mirror, your screen saver on your phone, your desk at work, anyplace that you will see it. Only play music that builds you up, same thing with the tv shows and movies you watch. Change your thought life, change your real life. Joyce Meyer wrote a book Battlefield of the Mind. It helps deal with negative self talk. Joyce can be a bit wordy but she makes some excellent points. Some of my favorites are “The mind is the leader or forerunner of all actions.” “If our thoughts are going to affect what we become, then it should certainly be a priority that we think right thoughts.

Try to make sure you always build yourself up, you are the only one who truly has to deal with you. The only person you need to impress is yourself. God made you so He already knows how great you are, and nobody else really matters.

 

Is everything ok?

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I get that question a lot. My husband probably asks me that, at least once a day, just to check in. Sure, I’m OK. Google dictionary lists the definition of OK as satisfactory but not exceptionally or especially good. Sounds decent right? No one is opposed to be ok. If you asked someone how they were doing and they responded ok, you probably wouldn’t probe further. OK suggests satisfaction.

Yes it is but I want better than ok. What’s better than be ok? I’m not great but I’m lot closer… I want to feel great everyday and I don’t every day but I’m close. With God I feel great everyday and that’s why I started this blog. He doesn’t seem so far away. He doesn’t seem like I need help as much like I’m drowning. I am still in disbelief, because I don’t feel like I’m working hard enough for his blessings, but you don’t have to work hard for blessing. I didn’t know that before we weren’t friends. He was my father but he wasn’t my friend. There is definitely a difference. I can remember conversations we had when I was struggling. If I couldn’t remember what He said I could go back to it cause I wrote it down. Its really the reason that I started writing. I wanted to make sure that I was hearing God’s voice and not my own. Reading the bible is truly the easiest way to hear Gods voice. I was searching all over in books. Getting advice from other people. Best advice that works exactly for you is to just spend with God. Read the bible, listen to gospel music, meditate, be still.  This seems contradictory to everything I essentially thought I wanted to blog. That’s why God wouldn’t let me put it out before. There wasn’t enough Dominique. I hadn’t spent enough time with Him to be a true representation of Him and the message he wanted me to convey and the way he wanted to convey. It wasn’t from God that’s why it was going to fail.

The more time I spent with God the better person I’m becoming. Less scared. Less concerned about what people think about me. More concerned what He thinks about me. If God is in it, it will not fail. He will lead you exactly where He wants you to go. I’m excited to see where my writing will take me. Whether its read by 1 person or 100 people, hopefully it will encourage someone.

32 is here

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My birthday has come and gone. It was a great day. Only thing that would have made it nicer was if it wasn’t raining. Im not tripping about the rain though, you need a little rain to appreciate the sunshine. Thanking God in advance that 32 will not be like 31. 31 was the hardest year of my life and I thought 30 was hard. Lol. I did things last year that I never thought I would do, survived hurts I never thought I would get over. That year made a better person. More emphatic, less judgmental. More flexible, less rooted to one idea and more willingly to learn and explore in ways I haven’t before. I learned how to lean on God more and me less. That I don’t have to meet this standard of perfection that I set for myself. That there is more than one way to so something. Perfection or close as possible is not what God wanted me to be. He wanted me the way he made me. He doesn’t care about my flaws because He wanted me to lean on him.

32 is going to be a challenge but this time versus other years I’m not plotting and worrying about how I am going to work things out. I am not trying to plan every moment of my life. I am truly living day by day, not worrying about tomorrow. Not thinking so much about each step but enjoying each moment. I will count my blessings not my problems. I’m excited to see what 32 brings. With God the possibilities are endless.

Introduction

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I will be 32 years old soon. I gave my life to Christ when I was a senior in college. I recently discovered my passion even though its been sitting right in my face most of my life.

I started this blog because I wanted to help people but bigger than that, I wanted to give people a perspective that I didn’t really see out there. I hope that I am able to walk the line between secular and gospel, and give you the reader; practical, realistic insight that will help you make the most of every situation that life throws at you.