Three books that had an impact on me

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Daily writing prompt
List three books that have had an impact on you. Why?
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The Books That Stayed With Me

I read 100 books last year, so trying to narrow that down to three feels almost impossible. But I love this prompt, so I’m giving it a try—not by ranking, but by naming the books that lingered. The ones that shaped how I think, how I move, how I pray, and how I see the world.

Rebecca Not Becky

Catherine Wiggington Greene & Christine Platt

This book challenged me in necessary ways. It forced me to sit with hard truths about race, faith, and performative allyship, especially within Christian spaces. It asked questions many people are uncomfortable asking and named dynamics many people prefer to ignore. It didn’t just inform me; it unsettled me, and that’s often where growth begins. It may be as a black woman look at the lived experience of white women in a different way and that was a good thing.

The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry

John Mark Comer

This book felt like a mirror. It confronted my pace, my productivity, and my quiet addiction to busyness. It reframed spiritual maturity not as doing more for God, but being more with God. In a culture that rewards exhaustion, this book gave me permission—and conviction—to slow down and reorder my life around presence instead of pressure. I love the way he writes, so friendly and conversational, plus he reads a ton so he has a lot of references, which I loved. I enjoy everything he writes and he is a Millenial like me.

Twelve Ordinary Men

John F. MacArthur

John MacArthur is a OG in bible study. What I appreciate about this book is that it was easy to understand and apply to everyday life. What stood out to me most here was the reminder that God consistently works through ordinary people. No polish. No platforms. Just availability, obedience, and time. It challenged the modern obsession with gifting and influence and pulled me back to faithfulness. A quiet but grounding read.

The 1619 Project

Nikole Hannah-Jones

This wasn’t just educational—it was clarifying. It reframed American history in a way that demands honesty and maturity. It reminded me that truth-telling is an act of courage, and that understanding the past is essential if we’re serious about shaping a better future. This book expanded my lens and deepened my resolve.

Awakening

Stovall Weems

This book landed at the right time. It spoke to leadership, repentance, and the cost of ignoring internal warning signs. It was sobering and reflective, especially for anyone in ministry or influence. A reminder that spiritual awakening often comes after painful honesty.

Razorblade Tears

S.A. Cosby

This one surprised me. Beneath the violence and grit was a deeply human story about grief, masculinity, fatherhood, and redemption. It was raw and uncomfortable, but also tender in unexpected places. Proof that fiction can sometimes tell the truth in ways nonfiction can’t. S.A. Cosby is soo good. Once I read this book, I wanted to read everything by him.

Final Thoughts

Looking at this list now, I notice a theme: formation.

These books shaped me spiritually, intellectually, and emotionally. They slowed me down, stretched me, and asked more of me than passive consumption.

If you’re looking for reads that don’t just entertain but transform, these are a good place to start.

The best ones don’t end when you turn the last page…they keep working on you long after.

Writing about Dominique

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Daily writing prompt
Write about your first name: its meaning, significance, etymology, etc.
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What’s in a Name?

I love this prompt. A name is so important. It’s one of the first things we’re given, long before we understand who we are or what we’ll become. A name is spoken over us before we can speak for ourselves.

My first name is Dominique.

Dominique means “belonging to God.”

I didn’t know that growing up. I’m pretty sure my parents didn’t either. There was no deep theological conversation, no baby-name book marked with meaning and origin. I was told my name came from the culture of the time. Either Dominique Devereaux from Dynasty or Dominique Wilkins, the basketball player.

It was the 80s. What could you expect?

A Name Before Its Meaning

For most of my life, Dominique was just a name. Something I answered to. Something teachers mispronounced. Something people commented on—“That’s different,” “That’s pretty,” “Is it French?”

It wasn’t until much later that I learned its actual meaning. Belonging to God. Of the Lord. Dedicated to God.

And when I learned that, it hit differently.

Not dramatically at first. A realization that settled slowly and then began to explain things I hadn’t had language for before.

Belonging Changes Everything

To belong to God isn’t just poetic. It’s directional.

It implies ownership, yes—but also care, responsibility, and purpose. It means you are not random. Not self-made. Not drifting without direction, even when it feels like you are.

Looking back, the meaning of my name explains a lot:

  • Why striving never fully satisfied me
  • Why people-pleasing always felt exhausting
  • Why I felt tension when I was busy but not aligned
  • Why I kept circling back to faith, purpose, and obedience even after seasons of distance

I spent years trying to belong everywhere—work, relationships, roles—when my name had already answered the belonging question.

The Irony of the 80s Inspiration

I think it’s fitting, actually, that my name came from pop culture icons of the 80s. A glamorous TV character. A dominant athlete. Strength, visibility, confidence, success.

And yet the deeper meaning of my name isn’t about image or dominance in the worldly sense.

What started as a cultural choice became a spiritual calling.

Living Into a Name

I don’t believe names determine destiny in a mystical way. But I do believe they can reveal something true when we’re ready to see it.

My name reminds me, especially in seasons when I’m tired, striving, or unsure, that I don’t have to prove myself into worth or earn my place.

I already belong.

And maybe that’s the work of a lifetime: not becoming someone new, but remembering who you’ve always been.

Daily Writing Prompt Reflection:
If you’ve never looked up your name, I highly recommend it. Not because it will tell you who you must be—but because it might gently remind you who you already are.

Sometimes meaning catches up later. And sometimes, it was there all along.

Making people uncomfortable

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HaileyPaigeMagee who is basically my IG therapist (LOL) is putting out great content about breaking people pleasing. One thing she said was

In order to break the people-pleasing pattern, we must learn how to sit with discomfort instead of reacting to it, including:

  • The discomfort of others being unhappy with us
  • The discomfort of letting others handle their own problems instead of rushing in to fix them
  • The discomfort of having difficult, honest conversations about our needs and boundaries

The discomfort that comes when we realize that others’ happiness isn’t our responsibility, but our own happiness is.

This was revoluntary for me because I didn’t want to disappoint anyone but realizing that adults could be disappointed and that was ok ,was big for me. That they would still like me, that they wouldn’t stop talking to me was big. I still struggle with this one, but I have gotten much better.

I still struggle with the discomfort of having difficult conversations, I don’t want to make people feel bad.I also don’t want to give negative feedback but sometimes people don’t realize how they are coming across and since they asked we should tell them.

I had to realize what was mine to hold and what I had to let go of.

Its interesting that I was more worried about disappointing other people than I was in disappointing myself.

Hailey says to recognize if you are people pleasing, do your insides match your outsides? Do you feel happy or do you feel anxious and resentful? I would take it a step further and ask how did you feel when it was over, do you feel warm and fuzzy or are you now going over all the things you said in your head. That probably isn’t the place you should be.

Until next time,

Dominique

When you don’t feel like yourself

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There are seasons in life when you just don’t feel like yourself. You can’t quite explain it, but something’s off. Here’s what that looked like for me—five stages I walked through to come out on the other side:

1. Isolation
I pulled away. I stopped talking as much, stopped showing up like I usually do. I was trying to dig myself out of a hole, but I was doing it alone—and it wasn’t working.

2. Reaching Out
Eventually, I told a few people what was happening and asked for prayer. They didn’t just say “I’ll pray for you”—they prayed for me right then and there. Hearing them talk to God on my behalf was healing in itself. Being vulnerable was scary, but it worked. They prayed, they encouraged me, and they helped me see things from a different perspective.

3. Crying Out to God
I started to cry out to God in my own time. I looked back through my notebooks, found highlighted verses, and reminded myself of what I already knew but had forgotten. It didn’t happen overnight, but little by little, I started feeling better.

4. Choosing to Show Up
Even when I didn’t feel like it, I kept tapping into God. I kept praying, kept listening to sermons, kept playing worship music. Sometimes our feelings have to catch up to where we are spiritually. You may never feel like doing the thing—but doing it anyway? That’s often when breakthrough happens.

I started going to events and gatherings, even when I didn’t want to. Being around friends and family helped me get out of my own head. Sometimes we just need to be around other people to remember that we’re not alone.

5. Surrendering to the Process
I recognized something was really wrong. I’d been going through the motions but hadn’t realized how off I was. I asked the Holy Spirit to pray for me because I didn’t have the words. I felt stuck. So I started praying for other people—and that helped a lot. It got my focus off myself. I was tired of hearing myself complain, tired of being in the same spot.

Then I came across this verse:

“For the kind of sorrow God wants us to experience leads us away from sin and results in salvation. There’s no regret for that kind of sorrow. But worldly sorrow, which lacks repentance, results in spiritual death.”
— 2 Corinthians 7:10 (NLT)

That hit me hard. I realized I was feeling spiritual death, not feeling anything at all. My sorrow had turned me inward, away from God, and that wasn’t helping me heal.

So I started praying:
“God, give me power to push through, discipline to get it done, and compassion for myself.”

Keep Your Mind Stayed on Him
Isaiah 26:3 talks about perfect peace for those whose minds are stayed on God. But how do we keep our thoughts fixed on Him?

For me, that meant consistency: listening to gospel music, pausing to pray, tuning into sermons—anything that lifted me up. I realized I needed more than just mindless activities. Scrolling isn’t bad, but it’s junk food. It gives a quick hit of relief, but it can’t sustain you or help you grow.

Try This:
Is there something you need to ask for prayer about?
Write down 1–2 people you trust and reach out to them this week. Ask them to pray with you—right then and there.

You’re not alone. And even if you don’t feel like yourself right now, healing is happening. One step at a time. One day at a time.

If you’re in a season where you don’t feel like yourself, know this: you’re not broken, you’re becoming. God is still with you, even in the fog. Healing doesn’t always come with fireworks; sometimes it shows up in small steps, quiet moments, and brave decisions to keep going when you don’t feel like it.

Don’t be afraid to reach out. Don’t hesitate to pray, even if all you can say is “help.” Keep showing up. Keep listening for His voice. Keep doing the things that feed your soul, not just distract your mind.

You will feel like yourself again. Maybe not all at once, but day by day, God will restore your joy, your strength, and your sense of purpose.

You’re not alone, and you’re not stuck. You’re growing. Keep going.

The Power of Should

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Things that destroy your self acceptance don’t come into your life fully grown.-Steven Furtnick (book title) p.84

They sneak up on you out of nowhere. Its little seeds of doubt that we water every time we worry instead of prayer. Every time we don’t show up for ourselves and let ourselves down, by doing the thing we say we won’t or by not doing the thing that we said we would. You start to despise parts of you because you fall short of what you should be.

Should is a tricky word isn’t it? Webster defines should as what is probable. I read this really interesting article on postivepresent.com that talks about how negative the word should is. She says three things about should that really made me think.

Should takes away from your accomplishments. You have done great things in your life, even if you don’t think so, even if they are small things but should can make you feel like the things you done don’t matter. If you buy your first house at 35 you take some of the wind out of your own sales if you say , oh should have already owned a house. If you have a baby at 35, oh I should have two kids by now, its downing the fact you have at least one. Should takes away from the hard work you have put in to get you where you are right now.

Should takes you out of the present. The bible speaks often about about not worrying about the future. Matt 6. 25-34. It also tells us not to focus on things of the past. Isaiah 43:18

We talked before about blooming where you are planted. Not worrying about what is ahead. We didn’t talk as much about worrying about the past. I am not a person who lives with a lot of regret. There are somethings I wish I would have done differently or situations that I wish I would have handled better but I don’t regret them, I am a firm believer that things happen the way they are supposed to, whether that is good or bad. My should’s are  definitely more future based but I know plenty of people whose shoulds are in the past. I should have said this during that argument, I should have drank less at that party, I should have moved away from home when I had the chance. Neither throught process helps us be the best version of ourselves. We can’t move into the person we are meant to be if we continue to focus on what things should be.

Should sparks negative emotions. All should does is make us feel bad about ourselves when we may not need to. Where you are currently could be perfectly fine and appropriate for this moment in time. Should can make you feel guilty, or put a heavy burden of expectation that you don’t need.

Where are your shoulds coming from? Are they coming from who God expects you to be? Or are they coming from what your parents said? Are they coming from trying to keep up with what society says you “should” be doing? Are you comparing yourself to your friends, family, that rando you went to high school or college with? What does God say you should be doing? What are His expectations? Have you asked him lately?

Instead of letting should shape your self-worth, shift your focus to what is, who you are today, what God is doing in your life right now, and the grace He gives you to grow.

Maybe it’s time to trade your shoulds for shalls.

You shall be who God created you to be.
You shall walk in purpose, not pressure.
You shall live free of comparison.

Ask Him. Trust Him. Let that be enough.

The Battle is the Lords

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The battle is Yours, Lord. It is Your battle. I lean on You. I give You all my weapons, all my skills, and I stand before You, trusting You.” – Chuck Swindoll

One of my anchor prayers used to be: “Lord, give me the right words to say.” Whether I was headed into a meeting at work, navigating a tough conversation with friends or family, or dealing with conflict, that was my go-to. At the time, it felt like a good and godly prayer.

But then God revealed something deeper: I was still relying on me. Communication is one of my strengths, and without realizing it, I was asking God to strengthen me in my way instead of surrendering to His way. I thought I was doing the right thing, but I hadn’t actually laid it down.

Now, my prayer has shifted: Less of me, more of You. Inspired by the gospel song by Earnest Pugh, I Need Your Glory, and rooted in John 3:30 — “He must increase, but I must decrease.”

When I rely on my own strength, I bring all my stuff with me , insecurities, resentment, pride, trauma. But when I give God my strength, He doesn’t just refine it , He replaces it. And in that space, there’s room for His wisdom, His power, His glory.

It’s a subtle shift, but it changes everything.

“All those gathered here will know that it is not by sword or spear that the Lord saves; for the battle is the Lord’s, and he will give all of you into our hands.”
— 1 Samuel 17:47 NIV

Words are my weapon , my strength and sometimes my crutch. I’ve been known to speak without thinking or to say the right thing with the wrong tone. But God is teaching me that my sword isn’t what brings victory.

“I put no trust in my bow, my sword does not bring me victory; but you give us victory over our enemies, you put our adversaries to shame.”
— Psalm 44:6–7 NIV

So now, I lay down my bow. I surrender my sword. I choose to fight differently ,not with sharp words, cleverness, or control but, with faith, surrender, and trust in the One who never loses a battle.

Because when the battle is His, the victory is already won.

The Power of Setting Boundaries with Yourself

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We talked before during self care about keeping your word to yourself. I want to expand on that a little bit. Do you set boundaries with yourself? Do you know what boundaries with yourself are?

Boundaries with oneself are the personal rules and guidelines we set to maintain a healthy relationship with ourselves. These boundaries help us manage our time, energy, and emotions, ensuring we stay aligned with our values and goals. They are essential for self-care, self-discipline, and personal growth.

It’s easier to let yourself down more than anybody else. If we keep pushing back our goal then we really haven’t let ourselves down right? We will eventually get to it. Right? Wrong!

Keeping your word to yourself helps build trust and confidence. I made a writing schedule that I stuck with for a few months now. I didn’t make any excuses I just did it. It felt good too. I am proud of me. I did that by:

Taking things one day at a time 

As always, I’m praying to keep this same energy and not start slacking, but I just need to take this one day at a time. If I miss one day, you miss too, but even if I do a little every day, it’s better than nothing.

Being willing to switch things up

I used to get up at 530 to write but I can’t necessarily do that now and it’s ok. As long as I get it done that is what counts. I was trying to force myself to do something that no longer fit my schedule or lifestyle and was making it feel like work. Anything that feels like unpaid work I’m not going to want to do it. 

This is like point 2b

  • I have to work on not be too rigid and going with the flow. I can have a schedule and an outline but if I get too much structure I start overthinking and it stifles my creativity. 

Setting realistic expectations for yourself

  • It’s crucial to set goals that are achievable within the constraints of your life. By setting realistic expectations, you set yourself up for success rather than disappointment. Adjusting your goals to fit your current circumstances shows self-awareness and adaptability.

Practicing self-compassion

  • Remember to be kind to yourself when things don’t go as planned. It’s okay to stumble along the way; what matters is how you pick yourself back up. Treat yourself with the same empathy and understanding you would offer a friend facing a similar situation.

Celebrating small victories

  • Acknowledge and celebrate the progress you make, no matter how small. Each step forward, no matter how insignificant it may seem, is a testament to your commitment and dedication to personal growth. By celebrating your achievements, you reinforce positive behavior and motivation to continue moving forward.

Reflecting on your journey

Take time to reflect on your journey, recognizing the challenges you’ve overcome and the lessons you’ve learned along the way. Self-reflection allows you to gain insight into your habits, strengths, and areas for improvement, empowering you to make informed decisions moving forward.

By implementing these strategies, you can establish healthy boundaries with yourself, cultivate self-discipline, and ultimately achieve your goals with confidence and resilience. Remember, the journey towards self-improvement is ongoing, and each day presents an opportunity for growth and transformation.

Until next time,

Dominique

Death to Distractions

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Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Hebrews 12:1-2

At the beginning of 2025, I listened to an 8-part sermon series by Pastor Mike Todd at Transformation Church that completely shifted my mindset. The message was clear: if you let go of distractions and stay focused on God, the things you want in life will start to align. That thought challenged me, inspired me—and honestly, convicted me.

I had a list of things I wanted to accomplish this year. Finishing my book was at the top, but there were other personal goals I had too. I was tired of talking about what I was going to do “one day.” I wanted this to be the year of action. But truthfully, I had things hindering me. I was tangled up—not in scandalous sin—but in what I like to call the almosts and not quites. You know, the moments where you’re close to obedience but not fully surrendered. The kind of sin that looks good on the outside but misses the mark on the inside.

So I made a choice.

I decided to truly fix my eyes on Jesus. That meant cutting out secular music, putting down the fiction books I love to read, and stepping away from social media. I didn’t make these changes to be religious or prove a point—I did it because I needed clarity. I needed to hear from God.

And I did. Loudly. Clearly. Consistently.

It felt like being hit with a firehose of revelation. I couldn’t keep up with what God was pouring in. And then… the attacks came. Spiritual warfare hit hard and heavy. It didn’t make sense at first. But then I realized: you don’t get attacked like that unless you’re close to something.

That’s when I knew. I was on the edge of breakthrough.

But I didn’t run back to comfort, like I normally would. I pressed in. I kept running the race, even when it felt lonely, even when I didn’t see the results right away. I started becoming more than just someone with goals, I became someone who was being transformed.

I’m still in that process. I’m still running. But now I understand the power of focus. The strength that comes from letting go of distractions. The joy that’s on the other side of obedience. I know that sounds corny but hear me out. God wants to help make decisions for so that we can be less stressed because we are trying to figure everything out.

So if you’re reading this and you’ve been feeling stuck, off-track, or overwhelmed, maybe it’s time to throw off a few things. Clear out the noise. Get quiet enough to hear from the One who already mapped out your race.

Fix your eyes on Jesus.
That’s where the freedom is.
That’s where the power is.
That’s where your next chapter begins.

Until next time,

Dominique

Do you approach life from lack or from abundance?

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Do you focus on all the things you have or are you looking at life through the lens of what you don’t have?

I’ve been diving deep into the concept of abundance lately, and it’s truly eye-opening. The word “abundance” is often associated with plenty, an overflowing supply. While that can include material wealth, the biblical perspective of abundance stretches far beyond that—it speaks to both physical and spiritual prosperity.

In the Bible, abundance is not merely about having a lot of things. It represents God’s holistic provision, covering everything from our needs in this life to the gift of eternal life. Abundance emphasizes God’s sufficiency. It calls us to rely on His grace, knowing that He has provided more than enough for us.

The key takeaway here is that God fills in our lack. We don’t have to focus on our shortcomings, our struggles, or what feels impossible. Instead, we can shift our focus to all that God has given us. His grace is sufficient, meaning He has equipped us with everything we need to accomplish His will.

But how do we embrace this abundance in our daily lives? How do we start each day knowing that we’re walking in God’s provision?

Here are four steps to living with a mindset of abundance:

  1. Seek God’s Priorities – Start your day by asking, “What matters most to You, God?” Align your heart with His purpose.
  2. Stay in God’s Presence – Let prayer, worship, and the Word be a daily rhythm. His presence is where true abundance flows.
  3. Stay Proactive – Take the next step with purpose. Even if it’s small, move forward in faith.
  4. Patience in the Process – Trust that God’s timing is a key part of His abundance. Be patient with the journey.

Remember, you don’t have to chase abundance. When God is your source, abundance is already yours to live from.

Until next time,

Dominique

A note before Mother’s Day

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Mother’s day can be hard. As we get ready for Mother’s Day tomorrow I realize that it may not look the same for everyone. I have cried on many of a Mother’s Day because I wanted to be a mother so badly and it wasn’t happening. I used to wonder if something was wrong with me or if I was good enough to be a mom. If that is you, just know that isn’t true. The timing may not be right now, but doesn’t mean it won’t happen.

It can seem like everyone is celebrating and you are not. Take what you need today. If its easier, stay off social media for the next few days. Gather with your support system. Buy yourself a treat. Take yourself out.

If you have a hard time on Mother’s Day for whatever reason I see you. I walk along beside you in solidarity.

6 Dark Sides of Mother's Day - Explore What's Next
https://www.explorewhatsnext.com/dark-sides-of-mothers-day/

Until next time,

Dominique